Thank you for submitting your Restored Marriage Testimony!
Dankie dat jy ‘n Herstelde Huwelik Getuienis Ingedien het!

Your next question may be—now what???
Jou volgende vraag mag wees—wat nou???

First, do you remember how Erin's husband came back for a short time, but then left again? Sometimes your "restoration" is simply the Lord giving you a time of deep emotional and spiritual rest because you are about to go through the final phase of restoration.

Eerstens, onthou jy hoe Erin se man teruggekom het vir ‘n kort tydjie, maar toe weer weg is?

Somtyds is jou “herstel” eenvoudig die tyd wat die Here jou gee vir diep emosionele en spirituele rus omdat jy op die punt staan om deur die finale fase van jou herstel te gaan.

How would you know?
Hoe sou jy weet?

Well, Erin said she could sense it wasn't over. She wanted it to be over, but something inside told her it wasn't. She says it's similar to when you’re pregnant, maybe even overdue, and you feel or hope it's time, but when it IS time—you know it!

Wel, Erin het gesĂȘ sy kon aanvoel dat dit verby is. Sy wou gehad het dit moet verby wees, maar iets binne haar het haar vertel dat dit nie was nie. Sy sĂȘ dit is eenders as wanneer jy swanger is, miskien oor jou tyd, en jy voel of hoop dit is tyd, maar wanneer dit tyd is—weet jy dit!

Most importantly, don't panic and don't try to figure it out, no matter where you are, the remedy is to always focus on the Lord, getting closer to Him as your HH "Heavenly Husband."

Mees belangrik, moet nie paniekerig raak nie en moenie probeer om dit uit te pluis nie, maak nie saak waar jy is nie, die genees middel is om altyd op die Here te fokus, om nader aan Hom te kom as jou “Hemelse Man”

February 3
3 Februarie

At once the Spirit sent him out into the desert. (Mark 1:12)
Net daarna het die Gees Hom weggevat die woestyn in. (Markus 1:12)

This seemed a strange way for God to prove His favor. “At once”—after what? After heaven was opened and the Spirit descended “like a dove” (v. 10), and the Father voiced His blessing, “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased” (v. 11). Yet it is not an abnormal experience.

Dit het gelyk soos ‘n vreemde manier vir God om Sy guns te bewys. “Net daarna”—na wat? Nadat die hemel oopgeskeur het en die Gees “soos ‘n duif” neergedaal het (v. 10), en die Vader sy seĂ«n uitgespreek het, “Jy is my geliefde Seun. Oor jou verheug Ek My” (v. 11). Tog is dit nie ‘n abnormale ervaring nie.

No, my soul, the actual suddenness of the change is proof that it is not abnormal. Have you considered the comfort of the words “at once,” and why the change comes so soon after the blessing? Simply to show that it is the sequel to the blessing. God shines His light on you to make you fit for life’s deserts: Gethsemane, and Calvaries. He lifts you to new heights to strengthen you so that you may go deeper still. He illuminates you so He may send you into the night, making you a help to the helpless.

Nee, my siel, die eintlike skielikheid van die verandering is bewys dat dit nie abnormaal is nie. Het jy die troos van die woorde “net daarna,” oorweeg en hoekom die verandering so gou na die seĂ«n gekom het? Eenvoudig om te wys dat dit die opvolger op die seĂ«n is. God skyn sy lig op jou om jou geskik te maak vir die lewe se woestyne: Getsemane, en Golgotas. Hy verhef jou na nuwe hoogtes om jou te versterk dat nog dieper kan gaan. Hy illumineer jou sodat Hy jou die nag in kan stuur, n jou ‘n hulp vir die hulpelose kan maak. 

You, my soul, have also experienced it. Aren’t your times of deepest depression the moments that immediately follow your loftiest highs? Just yesterday you were soaring high in the heavens and singing in the radiance of the morning. Today, however, your wings are folded and your song is silent. At noon you were basking in the sunshine of the Father’s smile, but by evening you were saying from the wilderness, “My way is hidden from the Lord” (Isaiah. 40:27).

Jy, my siel, het dit ook ervaar. Is jou tye van diepste depressie nie die oomblikke wat onmiddelik na jou mees verhewe hoogtes volg nie? Net gister het jy hoog in die hemele gesweef en die glans van die more. Vandag, egter, is jou vlerke gevou en jou lied is stil twaalfuur middag het jy in die sonskyn van die Vader se glimlag gebak, maar teen die aand het jy uit die wildernis gesĂȘ, “Die Here sien nie raak wat van my word nie” (Jesaja. 40:27). 

You are not always worthy of the wilderness—you are only worthy of the wilderness after the splendor of the Jordan River experience. Nothing but the Son’s vision can equip you to carry the Spirit’s burden, and only the glory of the baptism can withstand the hunger of the desert. George Matheson

Jy is nie altyd waardig van die wildernis nie—jy is net waardig van die wildernis na die prag van die Jordaan Rivier ervaring. Niks maar die Seun se visioen kan jou toerus om die Gees se las te dra nie, en net die glorie van die doop kan die honger van die woestyn weerstaan. 

After blessings comes the battle.

Na die seën kom die stryd.

The time of testing that distinguishes and greatly enriches a person’s spiritual career is not an ordinary one but a period when it seems as if all hell were set loose. It is a time when we realize our soul is caught in a net, and we know God is allowing us to be gripped by the Devil’s hand. Yet it is a period that always ends in certain triumph for those who have committed the keeping of their souls to God. And the testing “later on ... produces a harvest of righteousness and peace” (Heb. 12:11) and paves the way for the thirtyfold to one hundredfold increase that is promised to follow (see Matt. 13:23). Aphra White

Die tyd van beproewing wat grootliks ‘n persoon se spirituele lewensloop uitsonder en  verryk is nie ‘n gewone een nie maar ‘n tydperk wanneer dit lyk asof alle hel los gebreek het. Dit is ‘n tyd wanneer ons besef dat ons siel vasgevang is in ‘n net, en ons weet God laat ons toe om in die Duiwels se hand vasgegryp te word. Tog dit is ‘n tydperk wat altyd eindig in sekerlike triomf vir die wat toegewy is om hulle siele vir God te hou. En die beproewings “later aan...produseer ‘n oes van geregtigheid en vrede” (Heb. 12:11) en maak die pad oop vir ‘n dertigvoudige tot honderdvoudige oes wat belowe is om te volg (sien Matt. 13:23).

Backsliding
Afkerigheid

Many women who experience a restored marriage find they regress and go back to their old ways, which is really the most common danger and pitfall after restoration. Brittany shared about this in her BIO. Then, due to this becoming a habit, she finally fell for a married man and left ministering. Don’t let this happen to you. Be diligent to keep the LORD FIRST! You need your HH now more than ever, WHICH is exactly what Atarah wrote in a praise report.

Baie vrouens wat ‘n herstelde huwelik ervaar vind dat hulle agteruitgaan en terug na hulle ou maniere, wat regtig die mees algemene gevaar en slaggate na herstel is. Brittany het hieroor gedeel in haar BIO. Dan, aangesien dit ‘n gewoonte gevorm het, het sy finaal vir ‘n getroude man geval en die ministerie verlaat. Moet nie laat dit met jou gebeur nie. Wees naarstigtig om die HERE EERSTE te plaas! Jy het jou HM nou meer nodig as ooit, WAT presies is wat Atarah geskryf het in ‘n lofverslag.     

Atarah also shares the need of her HH even more after her restoration in these two Praise Reports: Revealed When He Wanted it to Be and Restored Even Before He Revealed!

Atarah deel ook die behoefte vir haar HM selfs meer na haar herstel in hierdie twee LofVerslae: Revealed When He Wanted it to Be en Restored Even Before He Revealed!

 

The other common danger is that you go the other way and you don't leave room for your husband to become your spiritual leader because you are trying to do it all. This is the ditch I personally fell into.

Die ander algemene gevaar is dat jy die ander pad gaan en nie plek vir jou man los om jou spirituele leier te word nie omdat jy probeer om dit alles te doen. Dit is die sloot waarin ek persoonlik geval het.

Either ditches will result in struggles, and often, the husband leaving again.

Eerder sal slote se resultaat ‘n gesukkel wees, en dikwels, die man wat weer loop.

Rocky and Rough Return
Wankelende en Rowwe Terugkoms

When most men return home (or when they ask you to return if you left), it doesn’t at all feel like the fairytale you'd imagined. Instead, it’s a rough and rocky portion of your lifelong journey with Him, and very often you feel like you either aren’t “really” restored OR you want to scream and ask God to undo what He’s done. This is how I felt after my husband returned, but trust me, that trial was short-lived once I refused the temptation to even think that way.

Wanneer meeste mans terugkeer huis toe ( of wanneer hulle jou vra om terug te kom as jy weg gegaan het), voel dit glad nie soos die veĂ«verhaaal wat jy jouself voorgestel het nie. In plaas daarvan is dit ‘n rowwe en wankelrige deel van jou lewenslange reis met Hom, en baie dikwels voel jy asof jy of nie “regtig” herstel is nie OF jy wil skree en God vra om ongedaan te maak wat Hy gedoen het. Dit is hoe ek gevoel het nadat my man teruggekom het, maar vertrou my, die beproewing was kort van krag toe ek die versoeking geweier geweier het om selfs so te dink.  

Dear Brides, today I'm writing because PTL I see through His eyes now and can see my EH "earthly husband" as God sees him and not as I used to. Our vision of the world becomes very different once we start to walk with the Lord, our HH, and live His promises and experience His Love to the fullest measure.

Liewe Bruide, vandag skryf ek omdat PDH ek sien nou deur sy oĂ« en kan my AM sien soos God hom sien en nie soos ek hom gesien het nie. Ons visie van die wĂȘreld word baie anders sodra ons saam die Here loop, ons HM, en Sy beloftes uitlewe en Sy liefde ten volle ervaar. 

Sara's "Now What?" Testimony
Sara se “Nou Wat” Getuienis

As you know from my RMT "Restored Marriage Testimony" Restored Marriage after Cancer—Holding my HH Hand, my EH returned home some months ago. He started to settle in little-by-little until one day the Lord asked me to check his drawers and almost all his clothes were at our home. This is when He confirmed that even he had some left clothes at his parents' home, He had started He had started working in his life 🙂

Soos jy weet van my HHG “Herstelde Huwelik Getuienis” Herstelde Huwelik na Kanker—Hou my HM se Hand, my AM het ‘n paar maande gelede huis toe gekom. Hy het begin bietjie-vir- bietjie begin intrek totdat die Here my een dag gevra het om sy laaie te ondersoek en amper al sy klere was by ons huis. Dit is toe hy bevestig het dat hy sommige van sy klere by sy ouers se huis gelos het, Hy het begin Hy het begin werk in sy lewe 🙂 

Soon after I sent my RMT, I received the "And Now What?" page (that I'd encourage everyone to bookmark and read often) explaining a little more in detail about the next phase of restoration: Once the EH gets home again. Even though you wisely warn us throughout how difficult it often is, even though I understood that trials still would come, I didn’t know to what extent. I'm very excited to see what my HH has in store for both of us now that we are together again, especially because of the many trials I have been through just recently. I know for sure that these happen because the Lord wants to draw me even closer to Him and also because He wants to work in my EH life, which has already started. Every person has a different RJ with the Lord, and husbands who return home are no exception.

Kort na ek my HHG gestuur het, het ek die “En Wat Nou” bladsy (wat ek almal aanmoedig om te boekmerk en dikwels te lees) en ‘n bietjie meer in besonders verduidelik oor die volgende fase van herstel: Sodra die AM weer by de huis kom.Selfs alhoewel jy ons wyslik dwarsdeur waarsku hoe moeilik dit dikwels is, self al verstaan ek dat beproewings nog steeds sal kom, het ek nie geweet wat die omvang daarvan was nie. Ek is baie opgewonde om te sien wat my HM in stoor het noudat ons weer saam is, spesiaal as gevolg van die baie beproewings waardeur ek onlangs is. Ek weet vir seker dat dit gebeur omdat die Here my nog nader aan Hom wil trek en omdat Hy in my AM se lewe wil werk, wat alreeds begin het. Elke persoon het ‘n verskillende HR met die Here, en mans wie terugkeer huis toe is geen uitsondering nie.   

I'm saying this because with no further details as I’m learning to be discreet, let's say the fairytale of him coming back is not really as I pictured it would be. However, my HH has given me a broader understanding of this situation and has told me that in spite of him living in a bit distant emotionally, almost as a single man again, I need to fully focus in Him, rely on Him only and not leaning on my own understanding.

Ek sĂȘ dit omdat met geen verdere besonderhede soos wat ek leer om diskreet te wees, kom ons sĂȘ die feĂ«verhaal van hom wat terugkom is nie regtig soos ek my voorgestel het dit sou wees nie. Nietemin, my HM het vir my ‘n breĂ«r verstandhouding van die situasie gegee soos wat hy my vertel het dat ten spyte van hom wat ‘n bietjie verwyderd emosioneel lewe, amper weer as ‘n enkel man, moet ek ten volle op Hom fokus, net op Hom staat maak en nie op my eie nie insigte nie.   

This week, for instance, my EH said we were very different and it was very hard for him to see how we could "fit" together gain. At first I was a little brokenhearted because I thought he didn't see my changes yet, but immediately after this, I ask my HH about it and immediately I understood! Of course, we don't fit as before, because now I'm a new person, the one He's been molding, and so, He will faithfully change him too, so we can be One, united under the same Love!

Hierdie week byvoorbeeld, het my AM gesĂȘ dat ons baie verskillend is en dat dit baie moeilik vir hom is om te sien hoe ons weer saam kan “pas”. In die begin was ek ‘n bietjie hart gebroke omdat hy nog nie my verandering raak gesien het nie, maar direk hierna, het ek my HM daaroor gevra en het ek onmiddelik verstaan! Natuurlik het ons nie saam gepas as vantevore nie, omdat ek nou ‘n nuwe persoon is, die een wie Hy besig is om te vorm, en so, Hy sal getrou hom ook verander, sodat ons Een kan wees, verenig onder dieselfde Liefde! 

Thank You, my Love, as I can hear Your voice so clearly now. Even when the enemy wants to attack, I can immediately rely on Your wonderful heart to show me the Truth. Thank You for the works You do every day in my life and my EH. All these situations will surely help us build our testimony for Your honor and glory. This as a Sacrifice of Praise and I know with conviction in my heart that You will help me endure in this portion of Journey—and even enjoy it!!! ~ Sara

Dankie, my Liefde, omdat ek Jou stem nou so duidelik kan hoor. Selfs wanneer die vyand wil aanval, ek kan onmiddelik op Jou wonderlike hart vertrou om my die Waarheid te wys. Dankie vir die werke wat Jy elke dag in my en my AM se lewe doen. Al hierdie situasie sal sekerlik help om ons getuienisse te bou vir Jou eer en glorie. Dit is ‘n Opoffering van Lof en ek weet met alle oortuiging in my hart dat Jy my sal help om hierdie deel van die Reis te verduur—en dit selfs geniet!!! ~ Sara

UPDATE: We recently heard from Sara who was ecstatic over the recent changes! One evening she sensed the Lord prompting her to take out and begin reading A Wise Woman that we'd sent her as part of the FREE Couple’s Packet. She said three nights later her husband asked for the companion book and began reading it! They both are on chapter 5 and Sara says she already has seen such growth in her husband!

OPDATEER: Ons het onlangs van Sara gehoor wie ekstaties is oor die onlangese veranderinge! Een aand het sy aangevoel dat die Here haar aanspoor om haar ‘n Wyse Vrou wat ons haar gestuur het as deel van haar GRATIS Paartjies Pakket uit te haal en weer te begin lees. Sy sĂȘ drie dae later het haar man gevra vr die metgesel boek en het dit begin lees! Hulle is albei op hoofstuk 5 en Sara sĂȘ sy het alreeds soveel groei in haar man gesien!  

Thankfully I had a wonderful older woman, Melanie, who most of you read about during your lessons. I remember sneaking off to call her, simply asking her to pray for me. When I explained she said, “The devil’s not going to let your man go, instead he’s tormenting him even more so he’ll never return back to the OW. So hang on to the Lord, Erin, and know He’s going to finish what He started.” Those were wise words and what I love to pass along to you! Wie meeste van julle oor gelees het gedurende julle lesse.  

Dankbaar het ek ‘n wonderlike ouer vrou, Melanie, gehad wie meeste van julle oor gelees het gedurende julle lesse. Ek onthou hoe ek stilletjies gegaan het om haar te skakel, en eenvoudig te vra om vir my te bid. Toe ek verduidelik het het sy gesĂȘ, “Die duiwel gaan nie jou man laat gaan nie, in plaas daarvan martel hy hom selfs meer sodat hy nooit weer sal teruggaan na die AV toe nie. So hou vas aan die Here, Erin, en weet Hy gaan voltooi wat Hy begin het.” Dit was wyse woorde en wat ek sal lief wees om na jou toe aan te gee!

 What the Lord showed me, when I asked Him how to encourage each of you, is to compare this to journey pregnancy and birth—something I know a LOT about 😉

Wat die Here my gewys het, toe ek Hom gevra het om elke een van julle aan te moedig, is om hierdie reis te vergelyk met swangerskap en geboorte—iets waarvan ek BAIE weet  😉

Think of everyone telling you, including all the experts—that you will NEVER have a baby. Then you find a famous fertility doctor (RMI) who says the opposite of what everyone else has told you—that “Nothing is impossible with God.” Then lo and behold, you find you are pregnant with hope.

Dink aan almal wat jou vertel, insluitende al die deskundiges—dat jy NOOIT ‘n baba sal hĂȘ nie. Dan vind jy ‘n beroemde vrugbaarheid dokter (HMI) wat die teenoorgestelde sĂȘ van wat almal anders jou vertel het—dat “Niks onmoontlik is met God nie.” Dan so by my kool, vind jy dat jy swanger is met hoop.

Unfortunately, you are frightened by what others keep telling you, the horror stories of women who have miscarried or later aborted (because the doctors say there will be abnormalities), so fear grips you. Then your wise fertility doctor tells you you need no more stress or you will lose your baby, your miracle. So He orders you to complete bedrest, “He makes me lie down in green pastures” with no visitors. And while in bed, to spend time reading about your new baby arriving. (Just like RMI tells you to get off social media and spending time resting in Him and learning how to deal with trials the right way—especially falling in love with Him.)

Ongelukkig, is jy  bang oor wat ander jou aanhoudend vertel, die gruwel stories van vrouens wat miskarame gehad het of later aborsies (omdat dokters sĂȘ daar was abnormaliteite), so vrees gryp jou. Dan vertel jou vrugbaarheid dokter jou jy het nie meer stres nodig nie of jy sal jou baba verloor, jou wonderwerk. So Hy beveel algehele bedrus, “Hy laat my rus in groen weivelde” met geen besoekers nie. En terwyl ek in die bed is, om tyd te spandeer oor jou nuwe baba se aankoms. (Net soos HMI jou vertel om af van sosiale media te kom en tyd te spandeer om in Hom te rus en te leer hoe om dadelik met beproewings af te reken—spesiaal om op Hom verlief te raak.)

Then you find your miracle is terribly overdue, and the skeptics again tell you it’s hopeless. Yet you don’t give up, you don’t abort, and all too soon you feel that your labor has begun and you feel you're not ready to be a mother! The most difficult period of your pregnancy and labor pass slowly, but sure enough, you BIRTH your miracle!

Dan vind jy jou wonderwerk is verskriklik uitblywend, en die twyfelsugtige vertel jou weer dit is hopeloos. Tog gee jy nie op nie, jy aborteer nie, en te gou voel jy dat jou kraam begin het en jy voel jy is nie gereed om ‘n moeder te word nie! Die mees moeilikste deel van jou swangerskap en kraam gaan stadig verby, maar seker genoeg, Jy gee GEBOORTE aan jou wonderwerk!  

Yet, that’s when the real work and trials begin!!

Tog, dit is wanneer die regte werk en die beproewings begin!!

Your little miracle is home but it's not what you pictured or imagined. Instead of the angelic little bundle, there is a red-faced crying, colicky infant screaming at you, and you’re convinced that it was better when you were pregnant. You long to have time alone, sleeping peacefully, and imagining your miracle rather than living the reality.

Jou klein wonderwerk is by die huis maar dit is nie wat jy jou verbeel het of voorgestel het nie. In plaas van die engeltjie bondel, is daar ‘n rooi gesig, huilende, koliekerige kleintjie wat op jou skree, en jy is oortuig dit is beter toe jy swanger was. Jy verlang om tyd alleen te hĂȘ, vreedsaam te slaap, en jou wonderwerk te verbeel eerder as om die realititeit te lewe. 

Yet, if this miracle of God is given time, patience and enough love— you’re soon able to establish the same routine you had—what got you pregnant with your miracle. The principles that also brought your pregnancy to term are the same principles that will help you get through the temporarily difficult time.

Tog, as hierdie wonderwerk van God tyd, geduld en genoeg liefde gegee word—sal jy gou dieselfde roetine wat jy gehad het—toe jy swanger geraak het met die wonderwerk vestig. Die beginsels wat jou swangerskap tot termyn gebring het is dieselfde beginsels wat jou deur die tydelike moeilike tyd sal bring. 

“Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For our momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:16–18).

“Om hierdie rede word ons nie moedeloos nie. Al is ons uiterlik besig om te vergaan, innerlik word ons van dag tot dag vernuwe. Ons swaarkry in hierdie lewe is maar gering en gaan verby,  maar dit loop vir ons uit op ‘n heerlikheid wat alles verreweg oortref en wat ewig bly. Ons oog is nie op die sigbare dinge gerig nie, maar op die onsigbare; want die sigbare dinge is tydelik, maar die onsigbare ewig” (2 KorintiĂ«rs 4:16-18)

Let me be clear, I am NOT a proponent of letting a baby cry themselves to sleep, HOWEVER, I am an advocate of letting a grown man who is being tormented by the enemy to be angry and even regret you being back together. Let your husband say anything he wants, AND let him speak without trying to console, comfort or assure him that there's something you can do to help him.

Laat my duidelik wees, ek is NIE ‘n voorsteller om ‘n baba toe te laat om hulleself aan die slaap te huil nie, NIETEMIN, ek is ‘n advokaat om toe te laat dat ‘n volwasse man wat deur die vyand getreiter word kwaad te raak en selfs spyt te hĂȘ dat julle twee weer saam is. Laat jou man enige iets sĂȘ wat hy wil, EN laat hom praat sonder om hom te probeer troos, op te beur of hom te verseker dat daar iets is wat jy kan doen om hom te help.  

Unlike a newborn baby, when men return home they more closely resemble a boy in the grips of “The Terrible Twos.” Yet, even during this stage of my children's lives, I never got angry or exasperated or felt the need to “fix” them. Instead, as their mother, I remained quiet and very loving—knowing it was a phase this child needed to get through. I spoke kindly, positively, and soon these antics weren't used because they never phased me. 

Anders as ‘n pasgebore baba, wanneer ‘n man terugkom aard hy meer na ‘n seun in die greep van die “Die Vreeslike Twee’s.” Tog, selfs gedurende hierdie stadium van my kinders se lewens, het ek nooit kwaad of vererg  geword of gevoel dat ek hulle moet “regmaak” nie. In plaas daarvan, as hulle moeder, het ek stil gebly en baie liefdevol—wetende dit was ‘n fase wat hierdie kind nodig het om deur te gaan. Ek het vriendelik en positief gepraat, en gou was hierdie streke nie gebruik nie want dit het my nie gefaseer nie.

Remember, too, what is VITALLY important. If your husband returned changed, a new man, then imagine how easily it would be for us to turn our hearts towards someone who we can actually see, imagine how soon our hearts would no longer have our Heavenly Husband as who we rely on. Whether our husbands are distant, angry, or frustrated—let your heart sing knowing this is also part of His plan to make sure we put Who will love us as we are meant to be loved, as His bride. No man, no EH or FH, no matter how changed could ever compete. Ask your HH for a new love song and sing it in your heart until it soars!

Onthou, ook, wat VITAAL belangrik is. As jou man teruggekom het veranderd, ‘n nuwe man,  verbeel jou dan hoe maklik dit vir ons sal wees om ons harte na iemand te keer wie ons eintlik kan sien, stel jou voor hoe gou ons harte nie ons Hemelse Man sal hĂȘ om op staat te maak nie. Of ons mans verwyderd, kwaad, of gefrustreerd is—laat jou hart sing wetende dat dit ook deel van Sy plan is om seker te maak dat ons plaas Wie ons sal liefhĂȘ soos wat ons bedoel is om liefgehĂȘ te word, soos Sy bruid. Geen man, geen AM of VM, maak nie saak hoe veranderd kan ooit kompeteer nie. Vra jou HM vir ‘n nuwe iefdes liedjie en sing dit tot jou hart sweef!  

Take full advantage of this phase, the one that will cement Who is first in your life. Become radiant in His love, so that nothing negative will diminish your glow because the next phase of restoration is when things will suddenly quiet down. And, if you haven’t made a mess of things—by returning to your old ways or trying to fix what your husband is probably blaming you for; remember, man began blaming back in the Garden so it's in his nature—then the next phase is when husbands should be ready to embrace the necessary changes he needs to make, completing your restoration, where you two finally become one and are equally yoked. Remember to read Sara's update and an additional miracle she never imagined!

Trek volle voordeel uit hierdie fase, die een wat sal sement Wie eerste is in jou lewe. Raak stralend in Sy liefde, sodat niks negatief jou skynsel sal verminder nie omdat die volgende fase van herstel is wanneer dinge sal begin om stiller te raak. En, as jy nie ‘n gemors van dinge gemaak het nie—deur terug te keer na jou ou gewoontes nie of om te probeer regmaak waaroor jou man jou moontlik blameer; onthou die mens het begin blameer terug in die Tuin so dit is in sy natuur—dan is die volgende fasewanneer mans gereed behoort te wees om die nodige veranderinge te omarm wat hy nodig het om te maak, en jou herstel te voltooi, waar julle twee finaal een word en aan dieselfde juk trek. Onthou om Sara se opdatering te lees en die wonderwerk wat sy haar nooit kon verbeel nie!   

But first, I must share something VITALLY important.

Maar eers, moet ek iets deel van VITALE belang deel. 

The Devourer
Die Verslinder

Yes, remember him, the devourer? The enemy who stole your marriage, your life, your husband and your joy? Well, just because God's promise came though, he won't stop. He will increase his attacks and do his best to try to destroy the blessing you were given, and he’s just sitting there waiting. One reason I believe women fall back into their old ways is because they STOP being spiritually fed. Even if your husband has already become the spiritual leader of your home and you begin attending a church together, you still need to keep up with the spiritually rich meals each morning in your Encourager and also to continue moving forward with your Wise Woman lessons (lessons that are designed for women who have a husband at home). But especially continue on with your Love affair with your HH by reading at least ONE Abundant Life chapter a week to ponder on. Without a HH you’ll soon find the flame will also go out on your restored marriage.

Ja, onthou hom, die verslinder? Die vyand wat jou huwelik gesteel het, jou lewe, jou man en jou vreugde? Wel, net omdat God se belofte deur gekom het, gaan hy nie stop nie. Hy sal sy aanvalle vermeerder en sy beste doen om die seĂ«n wat jy gegee is te vernietig, en hy sit net daar en wag. Een rede hoekom ek glo dat vrouens terugkeer na hulle ou maniere is omdat hulle ophou om spiritueel gevoed te word. Selfs al het jou man alreeds die spirituele leier van jou huis geword en julle kerk saam bywoon, moet jy elke oggend bybly met die spirituele ryk maaltye jou Bemoediger en ook voort gaan om vorentoe te beweeg met jou Wyse Vrou lesse (lesse wat ontwerp is vir vrouens wie ‘n man by die huis het). Maar spesiaal gaan voort met jou Liefdes verhouding met jou HM deur ten minste EEN Oorvloedige Lewe hoofstuk ‘n week te lees om oor na te dink. Sonder jou HM sal jy gou vind die vlam sal ook uitgaan in jou herstelde huwelik.  

ALSO, just as important as remaining spiritually fed, so you’re spiritually strong enough to withstand the attacks that will come against you, you need to be sure you keep your "Assurance Policy" with the Lord of hosts up to date! Read the many testimonies at the bottom and throughout the Assurance Policy.

OOK, net so belangrik as om spiritueel gevoed te word, sodat jy spiritueel sterk genoeg is om die aanvalle wat teen jou kom te weerstaan, moet jy seker wees jy hou jou “Assuransie Polis” met die Here die Almagtige op datum! Lees die vele getuienisse heel onder en dwarsdeur die Assuransie Polis. 

Here is another testimony that Emily shared that should encourage you:

Hier is nog ‘n getuienis wat Emily gedeel het wat jou behoort aan te moedig:

“My close friend now who has restored marriage, she was so afraid to tithe after she was restored, so I encouraged her and explained that since the Lord was able to make a way until now to tithe, He will continue to do so
 her EH even made a chart for all their expenses and if she spent some money, she has to write it down into this chart and document it. 

“My noue vriendin wie ‘n herstelde huwelik het, was so bang om tiendes te gee nadat sy herstel was, toe moedig ek haar aan en verduidelik aangesien die Here in staat was tot nou toe om ‘n manier te vind om ‘n tiende te gee, sal Hy voort gaan om so te maak...haar AM het selfs ‘n tabel gemaak vir al hulle uitgawes en as sy geld spandeer, moet sy dit op hierdie tabel neerskryf en dokumenteer.  

But my friend did not give into this fear and continue to tithe. The Lord is so so amazing of course, they are being blessed but the Lord is making sure her EH knows it is not coincidence...he is starting to be aware that there is something really happening behind the scenes!! Soon he also began tithing to RMI. What a miracle!

Maar my vriendin het nie ingegee aan hierdie vrees nie en voort gegaan om ‘n tiende te gee. Die Here is natuurlik so ontsagwekkend, hulle word geseĂ«n maar die Here maak seker dat haar AM weet dit is nie per toeval nie..hy begin om bewus te wees dat daar iets is wat regtig agter die skerms besig is om te gebeur!! Gou het hy ook sy tiende begin gee aan HMI. Wat ‘n wonderwerk!

Equally Yoked
Eweredig Ingespan

For me becoming equally yoked happened when, as a couple, my husband and I attended a seminar together. You may remember reading about it in the Renew Course “Securing Your Success.”

Vir my om eweredig ingespan te word het gebeur toe, as ‘n paartjie, my man en ek ‘n seminaar saam bygewoon het. Jy mag dalk onthou dat jy daaroor gelees het in die Hernu Kursus “Verseker Jou Sukses.”  

About two weeks after my husband returned home I saw that there was a Christian seminar I had signed up to go to, but then decided not to go. Yet, to my utter shock, my husband said he wanted to go with me!! I didn't even ask him!

Omtrent twee weke na my man terug is by die huis het ek gesien dat daar ‘n Christen seminaar is waarvoor ek opgeteken het om na toe te gaan, maar toe besluit ek om nie te gaan nie. Tog, tot my uiterste skok, het my man gesĂȘ dat hy saam met my wou gaan!! Ek het hom nie eens gevra nie! 

When I went to register him I found out that it was the "advanced" seminar, which meant he was ineligible. Yet with God nothing is impossible! A few days later they called to us say that the headquarters decided to use the seminar in our city to test and see if it was necessary to always require Seminar 1 before Seminar 2. And that my husband could go AND he could go for FREE!!

Toe ek gaan om hom te registreer het ek uitgevind dat dit die “gevorderde” seminaar was, wat beteken het hy was nie geskik nie. Tog met God is niks onmoontlik nie! ‘n Paar dae later het hulle ons geskakel om te sĂȘ dat die hoofkwartiere besluit het om die seminaar in ons stad te hou om te toets en sien of dit altyd nodig is om Seminaar 1 voor Seminaar 2 te vereis. En dat my man en ek kon gaan EN hy kon GRATIS gaan!!

But it just got better! As soon as I walked in, since it was the advanced seminar, I spotted at least a half a dozen pastors that I went to for help with my marriage when my husband was gone—all of whom had said it was impossible. They ALL recognized me and their mouths dropped when they saw whose arm I was holding—my wayward husband whom they said would NEVER return!!  

Maar dit het net beter geword! Toe ek ingeloop het, aangesien dit ‘n gevorderde seminaar was, het ek ten minste ‘n half dosyn pastore gesien na wie toe ek om hulp gegaan het met my huwelik toe my man weg was—almal wie gesĂȘ het dit was onmoontlik. Hulle het my almal erken en hulle monde het oopgehang toe hulle sien wie se arm ek besig was om aan vas te hou—my weerspannige man wie hulle gesĂȘ het sou NOOIT terugkeer nie!! 

The best was the pastor who said God was honoring the immoral relationship my husband was in with the OW. The pastor was all smiles when he came over because he was thinking that I had taken his advice and I found someone new! Isn't that funny?!?! And as soon as I said, "Oh, you remember me speaking about my husband, let me introduce you" the pastor grabbed my husband's hand and shook it vigorously! And during the rest of the seminar he couldn't take his eyes off us as a couple. Before we left he had invited my husband and me to his church several times during the break but my husband assured him we had a church home (the church that had opened their doors to my small but growing group of ladies, our first Restoration Fellowship.

Die beste was die pastoor wat gesĂȘ het dat God die immorele verhouding waarin my man betrokke was met die AV geĂ«er het. Die pastoor het geglimlag toe hy oor gekom het omdat hy gedink het ek het sy advies geneem en iemand nuut gevind! Is dit nie snaaks nie?!?! En toe ek sĂȘ, “O, jy onthou dat ek van my man gepraat het, laat ek jou voorstel” die pastoor het my man se hand gegryp en ferm geskud! En gedurende die res van die seminaar kon hy nie sy oĂ« van ons af hou as ‘n paartjie nie. Voor ons weg is het hy gedurende die breek  my en my man verseie kere na sy kerk toe genooi maar my man het hom verseker dat ons ‘n kerk huis gehad het (die kerk wat hulle deure oopgemaak vir my klein maar groeiende groep dames, ons eerste Herstel Fellowship.    

I hope that this will encourage you to KEEP QUIET and let God finish His work in you, in your husband and in your marriage. AND most importantly that you run after your HH, remain passionate about Him, and never look back! Be sure to run after your HH so fast that your husband will have to overtake you spiritually and even then, by remaining His bride, you will never be less alluring than before because your heart belongs to Another!

Ek hoop dat dit jou sal aanmoedig om STIL TE BLY en God toe te laat om  Sy werk in jou klaar te  maak, in jou man en in jou huwelik. EN mees belangrik dat jy agter jou HM aanhardloop, passievol bly oor Hom, en nooit terug kyk nie! Wees seker om so vinnig agter jou HM aan te hardloop dat jou man jou spiritueel moet verby neem en selfs dan, deur Sy bruid te bly, sal jy nietemin minder aanlokkend wees as vantevore omdat jou hart aan ‘n Ander behoort!   

And once He's had you alone long enough, once He's done perfecting and intensely loving you, you will not need to send out any announcements about what God has done! He will orchestrate a similar situation just like He did for me! Preparing a table before you in the presence of your enemies!!!

En sodra Hy jou lank genoeg gehad het, sodra Hy klaar is om jou perfek te maak en intensief lief te wees vir jou, sal jy nie nodig hĂȘ om enige aankondigings uit te stuur oor wat Hy gedoen het nie! Hy sal ‘n soortgelyke situasie orkestreer net soos wat Hy vir my gedoen het! En jou by ‘n feesmaal laat aansit, tewwyl jou teĂ«staandrs moet toekyk!!!  

Psalm 23:1-3 NKJV

Psalm 23:1-3 Afr 83 

"The Lord is my shepherd,

“Die Here is my herder,

I shall not want.

Ek kom niks kort nie.

He makes me lie down in green pastures;

Hy laat my rus in groen weivelde.

He leads me beside quiet waters.

Hy bring my by waters waar daar vrede is.

He restores my soul;

Hy gee my nuwe krag.

He leads me in the paths of righteousness

Hy lei my op die regte paaie

For His name’s sake.

Tot die eer van sy Naam.

"Yes, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

Selfs al gaan ek deur donker dieptes,

I will fear no evil;

Sal ek nie bang wees nie,

For You are with me;

Want U is by my.

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

In U hande is ek veilig.

"You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

U laat my by ‘n feesmaal aansit, terwyl my teĂ«staanders moet toekyk.

You anoint my head with oil;

U ontvang my soos ‘n eregas,

My cup runs over.

Ek word oorlaai met hartlikheid.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me 

U goedheid en liefde 

 

All the days of my life;

my lewe lank by my bly

 

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord

En ek sal tuis wees in die huis van die Here

Forever."

Tot in lengte van dae. 

 

It was also at this seminar that the Lord gave me many desires of my heart. It was at this seminar that taught my husband (and me) about getting out of debt, and also about trusting God with our fertility. Prior to this my husband was adamant about us having “no more children!” Yet due to what he learned I became pregnant only a couple of months later, with our daughter, Tara, who has been working at for RMI since she turned 20.

Dit was ook by hierdie seminaar dat die Here my so baie van die begeertes van my hart gegee het. Dit was by die seminaar wat my man (en ek) geleer het hoe om uit die skuld te kom, en ook oor om God te vertrou met ons vrugbaarheid. Voor dit was my man vasbeslote dat ons “nie meer kinders” moet hĂȘ nie!” Tog as gevolg van wat ek geleer het het ek net ‘n paar maande later swanger geraak, met ons dogter, Tara, wat sedert sy 20 is vir HMI werk.    

OUR GIFT to YOU
ONS GESKENK aan JOU

CONGRATULATIONS on your Restored Marriage!
GELUK met jou Herstelde Huwelik!

Couple's Packet
Paartjies Pakket

We would like to send you a FREE Couple’s Packet that includes the men’s and women’s paperback A Wise Man and A Wise Woman, by simply filling out the very short form (below), to verify your mailing address, and send you the FREE Couple’s Packet.

Ons sal daarvan hou om vir jou ‘n GRATIS Paartjies Pakket te stuur wat die mans en vrouens se sagteband boek ‘n Wyse Man en ‘n Wyse Vrou insluit, deur eenvoudig die baie kort vorm (hier oner) in te vul, om jou epos adres te bevestig, en vir jou die GRATIS Paartjies Pakket te stuur.

After you receive your workbooks, put them away in a safe place, then begin to SG to know when to share it with your husband— so that He can become the spiritual leader you've needed. (Reread Sara's UPDATE above.) Once you give it to him, let him know that it’s simply reading just one lesson a week, the same lesson week, from your perspective books. And by doing so, it will help you maintain the “gentle and quiet spirit” that encouraged him to return home.

Nadat jy jou werk boeke ontvang het, sit hulle weg op ‘n veilige plek, begin dan GN om te weet wanneer om dit met jou man te deel—sodat Hy die spirituele leier kan word wat jy nodig gehad het. (Lees weer Sara se OPDATERING hier bo.) Sodra jy dit vir hom gee, laat hom weet dat dit eenvoudig is om net een les per week te lees, dieselfde les week, uit jou  perspektiwieste boeke. En deur dit te doen, sal dit jou help om die “stil en sagmoedige” gees te handhaaf wat hom aangemoedig het om terug te kom huis toe.  

Also, let your husband know that if He’s interested, there is a men’s site and a Weekly Encourager blog he may enjoy. You may want to simply open the site on a computer and ask him to tell you what he thinks. That’s when you can also tell him about how being part of this ministry is what changed you, and because you don’t want to go back to your old ways, you’re planning on continuing so that you can give back—helping women not make the same mistakes you made by:

Ook, laat jou man weet dat as Hy geinteresseerd is, is daar ‘n man se werf en ‘n Weeklikse Aaanmodiger blog wat hy mag geniet. Jy mag dalk eenvoudig die werf op ‘n rekenaar oop maak en hom vra om jou te vertel wat hy dink. Dit is wanneer jy hom ook kan vertel oor hoe om deel te wees van hierdie ministerie is wat jou verander het, en omdat jy nie terug wil gaan na jou ou maniere nie, jy beplan om voort te gaan sodat jy kan terug te gee—en vrouens help om nie dieselfde foute te begaan deur: 

Becoming a Minister

Word ‘n Minister

Becoming an Evangelist 

Word ‘n Evangelis 

Becoming a Prayer Warrior 

Word ‘n Gebed Krygsman

Please CLICK HERE to receive your FREE Couple’s Packet.

KLIK Asseblief HIER om jou GRATIS Paartjies Pakket te ontvang.  

*If you already have A Wise Woman or if you’d like it in another language, please use the section *Special Instructions to let Encouraging Bookstore know.

*As jy alreeds ‘n Wyse Vrou het of jy daarvan sal hou om dit in ‘n ander taal te hĂȘ, gebruik asseblief die afdeling *Spesiale Instruksies om die Bemoedigers Boekwinkel te laat weet.

** Remember, don’t get in the way of what the Lord wants to do with your husband, by doing MORE than He wants you to do, nor being afraid of saying anything when it’s time. 

*Onthou, moet nie in God se pad staan vir wat hy met jou man wil doen nie, deur MEER te doen as wat Hy wil hĂȘ jy moet doen, nog  minder om bang te wees om enige iets te sĂȘ wanneer dit tyd is.

Amazingly, you will know when your husband is ready in the same way that mothers know when her children are ready to be potty trained or they’re ready to learn to read. Yet, don’t simply trust your instincts, because of course, your husband is NOT one of your children and even more importantly, you have a Heavenly Husband who will let you know. And when it’s time (as Sara above shared), you’ll be ready, please read this!

Wonderbaarlik, sal jy weet wanneer jou man gereed is op dieselfde manier wat moeders weet wanneer hulle kinders gereed is om te leer hoe om die toilet te gebruik. Tog, moet nie eenvoudig op jou instinkte vertrou nie, want natuurlik, is jou man NIE een van jou kinders nie en selfs meer belangrik, jy het ‘n Hemelse Man wat jou sal laat weet. En wanneer dit tyd is (soos Sara bo gedeel het), sal jy gereed wees, lees dit asseblief! 

Just as it’s disastrous to not potty train your toddler when it’s time (because he/she will end up wearing diapers for a year or more longer!), the same is true for failing to share about your involvement with this ministry and about the FREE Workbooks that will help you live happily together. Yet, if you introduce this to your husband too soon, it’s the same as trying to potty train a one-year-old: it will take much longer and require too much effort you weren’t meant to carry.

Net so rrampspeodig om nie jou kleuter toilet gewoontes te leer wanneer dit tyd is nie (omdat hy/sy sal opeindig om doeke te dra vir ‘n jaar of meer langer!), dieselfde is waar om te faal om jou betrokkenheid met die ministerie te deel en oor die GRATIS Werk boeke wat jou sal help om gelukkig saam te bly. Tog, as jy dit te gou aan jou man voorstel, is dit dieselfde as om ‘n eenjarige toilet gewoontes te leer: dit sal baie langer neem en te veel inspanning kos wat jy nie bedoel was om te dra nie.

So let me encourage you—now that your marriage is RESTORED—even though he may probably become angry or depressed or any other number of reactions to the enemy turning up the heat—that His plan is to complete what He started. So of course, this is the time to spend MORE time with your HH not less—which is another difficulty that He, alone, can solve. Also remember this is temporary, this will not continue. 

So laat my jou nou aanmoedig—nou dat jou huwelik HERSTEL is—alhoewel hy dalk mag kwaad en depressief raak of enige ander getal reaksies wanneer die vyand die hitte opdraai—dat Sy plan is om te voltooi wat Hy begin het. So natuurlik, is dit die tyd om MEER tyd met jou HM te spandeer nie minder nie—wat nog ‘n moeilike ding is wat Hy, alleen, kan oplos. Onthou ook dit is tydelik, dit sal nie voort gaan nie.

“Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For our momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:16–18).   

“Om hierdie rede word ons nie moedeloos nie. Al is ons uiterlik besig om te vergaan, innerlik word ons van dag Tot dag vernuwe. Ons swaarkry in hierdie lewe is maar gering en gaan verby, maar dit loop vir ons uit op ’n heerlikheid wat alles verreweg oortref en wat ewig bly. Ons oog is nie op die sigbare dinge gerig nie, maar op die onsigbare; want die sigbare dinge is tydelik, maar die onsigbare ewig” (2 KorintiĂ«rs 4: 16-18).

Spiritually Fed and Nourished
Spiritueel Gevoer en Gevoed 

Please don’t make the mistake that so many who have gone before you have made and stop reading your Encourager or doing your Wise Woman course and living or finding your Abundant Life. If you don’t remain spiritually fed, you are simply making a U-Turn and you’ll soon find your husband has left or the OW "other women" will appear again (either the prior OW or a new one). What changed everything is knowing and following the truth. And the only way you could keep your mind refreshed, and have the spiritual strength necessary, is to continue to feast on His Word, provided through the Encourager and Abundant lessons you consumed daily. ALSO submitting praise reports to encourage other women because often it's our own that we read later that really provides unfading faith!

Moet asseblief nie die fout maak wat so baie wat voor jou gegaan het gemaak het nie en stop om jou Bemoediger te lees of jou Wyse Vrou kursus te doen en om die Oorvloedige lewe te lewe of te vind. As jy nie spiritueel gevoed bly nie, maak jy eenvoudig ‘n u-draai en jy sal gou vind jou man het geloop of die AV “ ander vrou” maak weer haar verskyning (of die vorige AV of ‘n nuwe een). Wat alles verander het is om die waarheid te ken en te volg. En die enigste manier wat jy jou verstand verfris kan hou is, en om die spirituele krag wat nodig is te hĂȘ, is om voort te gaan om op Sy Woord te smul, voorsien deur die Aanmoediger en Oorvloedige lesse wat jy daagliks verteer. OOK om lofveslae in te dien om ander vrouens te bemoedig omdat dit dikwels ons eie is wat ons later lees wat regtig onverwelklike geloof voorsien!   

One way that will help is to let your husband know about the online courses you’ve been taking that have helped you. NO, you don’t need to tell him all about why you came here, to find hope for your restored marriage, or about your new relationship with the Lord as your HH. 

Een manier wat sal help is om jou man te laat weet oor die aanlyn kursusse wat jy geneem het wat jou gehelp het. NEE, jy hoef hom nie te vertel hoekom jy hiernatoe gekom het nie, om hoop te vind vir jou herstelde huwelik, of oor jou nuwe verhouding met die Here as jou HM nie. 

If he insists, that’s when you can share its RMIOU that was set up in order to have a site available to share with those who are concerned about you. Just about everyone is encouraging about getting more education, and online universities and course are offered all the time. Also, if you do continue, you can Become a Minister and possible be supported by us as we've done with quite a few ministries. 

As hy daarop aandring, is dit wanneer jy kan deel dat dit RMIOU is wat opgestel was in orde om ‘n werf beskikbaar te hĂȘ om te deel met die wat bekommerd is oor jou. Omtrent almal is bemoedigend om meer opvoeding te kry, en aanlyn universiteite en kursusse word die heel tyd geoffer. Ook, as jy wel voortgaan, kan jy ‘n Minister Word en moontlik deur ons ondersteun word soos wat ons met ‘n hele paar ministeries gedoen het.  

Like everything, trust that the Lord will help you say what you need to, and to help you set aside time every day to continue. If you work outside the home, go into work early, study your lesson during your lunch and/or stay long enough after work to study. Even if you just study as if you go to the gym 3 times a week is much wiser than stopping, and again—finding yourself here again when your husband leaves or the OW shows up in his life is not the time to start being spiritually fed again.

Soos met alles, vertrou dat die Here jou sal help om te sĂȘ wat jy nodig het om te sĂȘ, en om jou te help om tyd elke dag opsy te sit om voort te gaan. As jy buite die huis werk, gaan vroeg werk toe, bestudeer jou les gedurende jou etensuur en/of bly lank genoeg na werk om te studeer. Selfs al studeer jy net soos wat jy 3 maal per week gym toe gaan dit is baie wyser as om op te hou, en weer—om jouself weer hier te vind wanneer jou man weggaan of die AV in sy lewe verskyn is nie die tyd om weer te begin om spiritueel gevoed te word nie.

Remaining LOVED
Bly BEMIN 

In order to continue to LOVE your husband, by channeling the agape love He’s giving you, you MUST carve out time for your HH, and be sure you remain faithful to Him. Make sure He remains FIRST in your life, again putting Him first in your day. Get up earlier, and maybe leave earlier if you go to work, this way your EH isn’t used by the enemy to begin to take away what love your EH is going to need from you.

Om in staat te wees om voort te gaan om vir jou man LIEF te wees, deur die agape liefde wat Hy jou gee te kanaal, MOET jy tyd vir jou HM uitkerf, en wees seker dat jy getrou aan Hom bly. Maak seker Hy bly EERSTE in jou lewe, plaas Hom weer eerste in jou dag. Staan vroeër op, en miskien gaan vroeër huis toe as jy werk, op hierdie manier word jou AM nie deur die vyand gebruik om te begin om die liefde wat jou AM van jou gaan benodig weg te neem nie.

We promise if you continue to go through just ONE chapter a week to ponder on your HH throughout your day, and the sing the Love Songs to Him in your heart, you’ll continue moving forward in your JOURNEY—that is not intended to END when God restores your earthly marriage—but is just the beginning of Him writing more amazing chapters in your life. Also He wants you to use what you’ve gone through to help encourage other women!

Ons belowe as jy voort gaan om deur net EEN hoofstuk per week te gaan om gedurende jou dag na te dink oor jou HM, en die Liefdes Liedjies vir Hom in jou hart sing, sal jy voort gaan om vorentoe in jou REIS te beweeg—dit is nie bedoel om te EINDIG wanneer God jou aardse huwelik herstel nie—maar is net die begin van Hom wat meer wonderlike hoofstukke in jou lewe skryf. Hy wil ook gebruik waardeur jy gegaan het om jou te help om ander vrouens te bemoedig!   

Becoming a Minister

Word ‘n Minister

Becoming an Evangelist

Word ‘n Evangelis 

Becoming a Prayer Warrior 

Word ‘n Gebeds Krygsman

Are you Keeping you HH First?
Hou jy jou HM Eerste?

If I had to say what the biggest stumbling block is when any EH returns home is you trying to KEEP your EH home. You will find out for yourself, as I did, that doing works, walking on eggshells and submitting to his emotions is not only exhausting, it's counterproductive—unraveling what He's done.

As jy moet sĂȘ wat die grootste struikel blok is wanneer jou AM terugkeer huis toe is jy wat jou AM by die huis probeer HOU. Jy sal vir jouself uitvind, soos wat ek het, dat om werke te doen, op eierdoppe te loop en in te gee tot sy emosies is nie net uitputtend nie, dit is kontraproduktief—ontrafel wat Hy gedoen het. 

Had I fallen into this pit unable to climb out, there would be no RMI ministry to this day.

Het ek in hierdie put geval en nie in staat om uit te klim nie, sou daar geen HMI vandag wees nie. 

After my EH returned, the enemy still fought hard and of course, this made my EH miserable to live with—so much so I was tempted to say (not to him) but just to myself “I wish he never came back!” But I wisely refrained knowing this would be a slap in the face to God who’d restored my marriage, and that’s the KEY— GOD restored us. So I never said it, though I really, really felt this way, and weathered the initial storm—by getting closer to my HH, not by trying to fix anything or appease my EH—because, again, GOD restored us. It was nothing I did—nor was it anything you did either.

Nadat my AM teruggekom het, het die vyand nog steeds hard baklei en natuurlik, het dit my AM misluk gemaak om mee saam te lewe—so ek was in die versoeking gelei om te sĂȘ (nie vir hom nie) maar net vir myself “Ek wens hy het nooit teruggekom nie!” Maar ek het wyslik myself teruggehou want ek het geweet dit sou ‘n klap in die gesig vir God wees wie my huwelik herstel het, en dit is die SLEUTEL—God het ons herstel. So ek het dit nooit gesĂȘ nie, alhoewel ek regtig, regtig so gevoel het, en ek het die aanvanklike storm deurstaan—deur nader aan my HM te kom, nie om te probeer om enige iets reg te maak nie of om my AM te bevredig nie—omdat, weer, God het ons herstel. Dit was niks wat ek gedoen het nie—nog minder was dit enige iets wat jy gedoen het nie.    

After weathering this storm, soon my EH was a new man, happy, happy, happy! But the enemy won’t give up, we all know that. Soon my EH began to have issues with the Restoration Fellowship class I was leading on Monday nights.

Nadat ek die storm deurstaan het, was my AM gou ‘n nuwe man, gelukkig, gelukkig, gelukkig! Maar die vyand sal nie opgee nie, ons almal weet dit. Gou het my AM twispunte met die Herstel Fellowship klas wat ek Maandae aande gelei het gehad.

We chose Monday nights (of course it was His leading we are never that wise!) due to it having childcare for our young mothers but also because it just so happened that this is when football was on “Monday Night Football.” My EH has always been a fan, so this was ideal. Nevertheless, beginning early in the day, my EH would ask me if I “had to go.” Most women simply give in to those emotions, and falsely believe she needs to “agree with her adversary” or submit but what was happening was the enemy’s cunning scheme. “It’s my duty to make sure that Satan does not win even a small victory over us, for we don’t want to be naïve and then fall prey to his schemes.”2 Corinthians 2:11 The Voice

Ons het Maandae aande gekies (natuurlik was dit Sy leiding ons is nooit so wys nie!) aangesien dit kindersorg vir ons jong moeders gehad het en ook omdat dit net so gebeur het dat voetbal aan was op “Maandae Aande Voetbal.” My AM was altyd ‘n entoesias, so dit was ideaal. Nietemin, vroeg in die dag het my AM begin, met “moet ek gaan.” Meeste vrouens gee eenvoudig in aan daardie emosies, en glo valslik dat sy moet “betyds tot ‘n skikking kom” of jou onderwerp maar wat besig was om te gebeur was die vyand se slu skema. “ Die Satan moet nie die oorhand oor ons kry nie. Ons ken sy planne maar alte goed.” 2 KorintiĂ«rs 2:11 Afr 83 Vertaling.

There’s no doubt I would have fallen for it had I not kept the close relationship with my HH or if I had forgotten Who restored my marriage, GOD. So I took this to my true Love and He had me respond kindly with “If you are saying to stay home, then I will.” Each time, without fail, my EH would say something like, “No, I’m not saying not to go, I just wish you wouldn’t” Did you catch that? “I wish” or “I would hope” and phrases like this that were based on his feelings, which is dangerous to submit to.

Daar is geen twyfel ek sou daarvoor geval het het ek nie ‘n noue verhouding met my HM gehad of as ek vergeet het Wie my huwelik herstel het, GOD. So toe neem ek dit na my ware Liefde en Hy het my vriendelik laat reageer met “As jy sĂȘ ek moet by die huis bly, dan sal ek.” Elke keer, sonder faal, sou my AM iets sĂȘ soos, “Nee, ek sien nie jy moet nie gaan nie, ek wens net jy sou nie” Het jy dit gevang? “Ek wens” of “Ek hoop” en frases soos dit wat gebaseer is op sy gevoelens, wat gevaarlik is om jou aan te onderwerp. 

We know how fickle our own emotions are and how they manipulate us. This is true for EH too. So each time my EH would say something about not going on Mondays to lead my fellowship, which could seriously be a dozen times each and every Monday (he worked from home), I would respond with “If you are saying to stay home, then I will.” And not ONCE, even when he would be leaning on the window of the car as I’d pull away, did he ever say this is what he was telling me to do, not to go. Of course when I left I felt guilty but it was false guilt that I had to shake off.

Ons weet hoe wispelturig ons eie emosies is en hoe hulle ons manipuleer. Dit is ook waar vir ons AM ook. So elke keer wat my AM iets sou sĂȘ oor om nie Maandae aande te gaan om my fellowship te lei nie, wat ernstig ‘n dosyn kere ieder en elke Maandag aand was (hy het van die huis af gewerk), het ek reageer met “as jy sĂȘ ek moet by die huis bly, dan sal ek. “En nie EEN keer nie, selfs wanneer hy op die venster geleun het soos wat ek weg gery het, het hy ooit gesĂȘ dit is wat hy my sĂȘ om te doen nie, om nie te gaan nie. Natuurlik toe ek weg is het ek skuldig gevoel maar dit was ‘n vals skuld wat ek moes afskud. 

*One of the best confirmations was each week instead of coming back to a man sulking, he always said what a great time he had! Clearly a spiritual battle and once we've pressed past the temptation, the attack ceases (of course until next time).

*Een van die beste bevestigings was elke week in plaas daarvan om terug te kom na ‘n man toe wat knies, het hy altyd gesĂȘ wat ‘n lekker tyd hy gehad het! Duidelik ‘n spirituele stryd en sodra ons verby die versoeking gedruk het, het die aanval opgehou (natuurlik tot ‘n volgende keer).

Your situation may never be as ridiculous, I’m guessing this was so outrageous since one day (as we know) my EH chose to join me in RMI and the enemy knew just how many would find their LOVE at last.

Jou situasie mag nooit so verspot wees nie, ek raai dit was so verregaande aangesien een dag (soos ons weet) het my AM gekies om by my aan te sluit in HMI en die vyand het net geweet hoe baie sou hulle LIEFDE uiteindelik vind. 

There were also times that temptations would arise when I could have, very easily, tried to keep my husband home during one of his dark moods. Remember it’s we (not our EH) who the Lord’s love has changed; what was the magnet that drew each of our EH out of darkness was the light our EH and other say that lit the way back home.

Daar was ook tye wat versoekings sou opkom toe ek kon, baie maklik, probeer om my man by die huis te hou gedurende een van sy donker buie. Onthou dit is ons (nie ons AM) wie die Here se liefde verander het nie; wat was die magneet wat elkeen van ons se AM uit die donkerte uit getrek het was die lig wat ons AM en ander sĂȘ wat die pad huis toe verlig het.

“Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” Matt. 5:16. “Let your light shine everywhere you go, that you may illumine creation, so men and women everywhere may see your good actions, may see creation at its fullest, may see your devotion to Me” Matthew 5:15-16.

“Laat jou lig so voor mense skyn, dat hulle julle goeie werke kan sien en julle Vader wat in die hemel is, verheerlik.” Matt. 5:16. “Ook steek  mens nie ‘n lamp op en sit dit onder ‘n emmer nie maar op ‘n lampstaander, en dit gee lig vir almal in die huis  Matteus 5:15-16.

The best and quickest way to avoid the stumbling block when an EH returns and you are trying to try to KEEP an EH home is to remember WHO restored your marriage. It was GOD. Even the title of the book is How GOD Can and Will Restore Your Marriage. It was capitalized for many reasons, one is to help remind you Who restored it. So if GOD restored it, then you don’t need to worry or fret or be afraid it won’t remain that way. What you did to be in the position of becoming restored, is what you need to continue doing AFTERWARDS. As mentioned throughout, this is how the enemy chips away at your restoration. Your HH isn’t first, you cease to minister as you’ve done, you stop tithing, you stop your “ministry” to women (which is why He brought ALL of us through this crisis), and the list goes on.

Die beste en die gouste manier om die struikelblok te vermy wanneer ‘n AM terugkeer en jy probeer om te probeer om ‘n AM by die huis TE HOU is om te onthou WIE jou huwelik herstel het. Dit was GOD. Selfs die titel van die boek is Hoe God Jou Huwelik Kan en Sal Herstel. Dit is in hoofletters vir baie redes, een is om jou te help herinner Wie dit herstel het. So as GOD dit herstel het, dan hoef jy nie bekommerd te wees of verknies te wees of bang dit sal nie so bly nie. Wat jy gedoen het om in die posisie te wees om herstel te word, is wat jy nodig het om DAARNA aan te hou doen. Soos dwarsdeur genoem, dit is hoe die vyand weg kap aan jou herstel. Jou HM is nie eerste nie, jy hou op om te minister soos wat jy gedoen het, jy hou op om jou tiende te gee, jy stop jou ministerie aan ander vrouens (wat die rede is hoekom Hy ALMAL van ons deur hierdie krisis gebring het) en die lys gaan aan.    

A verse that depicts this is Matthew 5:13. “You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how will it be made salty again? It is good for nothing anymore, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men.” This is how restored women (and married women in general) become a doormat—trampled down by their husbands, who by the way, begin to loathe them. Does the word loathe remind you of anything?

‘n Vers wat dit uitbeeld is Matteus  5:13. “Julle is die sout vir die aarde. Maar as sout verslaan, hoe kry ‘n mens dit weer sout? Dit is niks meer werd nie. Dit word buitekant weggegooi, en die mense vertrap dit.” Dit is hoe herstelde vrouens (en getroude vrouens in die algemeen) ‘n deurmat word vertrap deur hulle mans, wie ter loop van sake, begin om hulle te verafsku. Herinner die woord afskuwelik jou aan enige iets?   

What happens when you put someone ahead of the Lord? What does He do to draw you back to Him? Some of us put our husbands first, and the Lord took our husbands from us! “Thou hast removed my acquaintances far from me; Thou hast made me an object of loathing to them. Thou has removed lover and friend far from me; My acquaintances are in darkness.” Psalm 88:8, 18.

Wat gebeur as jy iemand voor die Here plaas? Wat doen Hy om jou terug te trek na Hom toe? Sommige van ons plaas ons mans eerste, en die Here het ons mans van ons af weggevat! “ U laat my bekendes ver van af staan en maak my vir hulle iets afskuweliks.U laat my vriende en my bure ver van my af staan, die duisternis van die dood is my geselskap.” Psalm 88:8,19. 

Bowing down to anyone, which also includes your EH, is dangerous and will soon lead to loathing and your EH distancing himself from you.

Om af te buig na enige iemand toe, wat ook jou VM insluit,  is gevaarlik en sal gou lei tot afsku en jou AM wat homself van jou distansieer.

Here is an example I read recently from a minister who’d returned to continue the ministry He began, but she had put “on hold” and again succumbed to fear. 

Hier is ‘n voorbeeld waarvan ek onlangs gelees het oor ‘n minister wat teruggekeer het om met die ministerie waarmee Hy begin het voort te gaan, maar wat sy “opsy” gesit het en weer ingegee het tot haar vrese.  

"I need to take a MLA. My reason is my EH is supposed to be back home tomorrow. Although he has said it is okay to work again for the ministry, he doesn't know yet that I am actually back and working here again. I feel it is best to still be discreet and wait for the Lord to open another opportunity to let EH know like He faithfully did last time.

“Ek moet ‘n MVA doen. My rede is my AM is veronderstel om more terug te wees. Alhoewel hy gesĂȘ het dat dit reg is vir my om weer vir die ministerie te werk, weet hy nie eintlik dat ek terug is en weer hier werk nie. Ek voel dat die beste is om nog steeds diskreet te wees en vir die Here te wag om ‘n ander geleentheid oop te maak soos wat Hy getrou laas gedoen het om my AM te te laat weet. 

There is a sudden change in our relationship and I am not sure how it will be like when EH gets home tomorrow. I praise the Lord for holding me up and I am filled with His peace and joy. Only Him! Thank you."

Daar is ‘n skielike verandering in ons verhouding en ek is nie seker hoe dit sal wees wanneer my AM more by die huis kom nie. Ek loof die Here dat Hy my opgehou het en ek is gevul met Sy vrede en vreugde. Net Hy! Dankie.”

Even though she stated 'Although he has said it is okay to work again for the ministry', she makes her decision based on fear, not on discretion. True, most of us might feel fearful, but pressing forward, past this feeling, by continuing to minister is what God deserves for what He's done for you! And should her EH ask, a wife can lovingly remind him that he said it is okay to work again for the ministry, and that she’s continuing. The woman her EH saw would be the wise woman he wanted to be with again. And very possibly, "the sudden change in our relationship and I am not sure how it will be like when EH gets home tomorrow" would suddenly change—due to her EH seeing the “wise woman who [continues] to build her house” who “smiles at the future” rather than becoming a doormat “trampled underfoot by men.” 

Alhoewel sy verklaar het ‘Alhoewel hy gesĂȘ het dit is reg  om weer vir die ministerie te werk’ maak sy haar besluit gebaseer op vrees, nie diskresie nie. Waar, meeste van ons mag vreesbevange voel,  maar beweeg vorentoe, verby hierdie gevoel, deur voort te gaan om te minister is wat God verdien vir wat Hy vir jou gedoen het! En sou haar AM vra, ‘n vrou kan hom liefdevol herinner dat hy gesĂȘ het dit is reg om weer vir die ministerie te werk, en dat sy voortgaan. Die vrou wat haar AM gesien het behoort die wyse vrou te wees by wie hy weer wou gewees het. En baie moontlik, “die skielike verandering in ons verhouding en ek is nie seker hoe dit sou wees wanneer AM more huis toe kom nie” sal skielik verander—ter wyle aan haar AM wat die “wyse vrou sien wat [voortgaan] om vir haar haar huis te sorg” wie “ sy ken geen kommer het oor die toekoms nie” eerder as om  ‘n deurmat te wees wat “ onder die voet deur mans vertrap word. 

Unless this minister buries her face in her HH embrace, and stands up to fear, to “do what is right without being frightened by any fear” (1Peter 3:6) no matter what the fear is about, she will soon see her unfaithfulness to her HH result in her EH’s unfaithfulness also resurface.

Tensy hierdie minister haar gesig in haar HM se omhelsing begrawe, en opstaan teen vrees “en te doen wat goed is en julle nie deur dreigemente te laat afskrik nie” (1Petrus 3:6) maak nie saak waaroor die vrees gaan nie, sy sal gou sien dat haar onbetroubaarheid aan haar HM sal haar onbetroubaarheid in haar AM ook sien weer tevoorskyn kom. 

Now, here’s an example of the opposite.

Nou, hier is ‘n voorbeeld van die teenoorgestelde.

There are no words to express the joy in my heart at this moment :)))) As you know, dear brides, my marriage was restored a while ago and I have shared how "rocky and rough" (Quoting Erin in her Now what? document we receive after submitting our RMT) has been my EH®s return as he continued to be distant (in my worldly perception) and I have to admit that many times I had to "keep my thoughts captive" as there were many that tried to tell me that it would be very difficult if not impossible—for him to have a personal, intimate relationship with our HH. I, ladies, have remained quiet, have continued to seek God in ALL my things and situations, continued my FAL "Finding the Abundant Life" courses, in addition to tithing and the other scriptural principles shared by Erin.

Dar is geen woorde om die vreugde in my hart op hierdie oomblik uit te druk nie :)))) Soos jy weet, liewe bruide, my huwelik was ‘n tydjie terug herstel en ek het gedeel hoe “wankelrig en rof” (Haal Erin aan in haar Nou wat? dokument wat ons ontvang het nadat ons ons HHG ingedien het) was my AM se terugkoms soos wat hy voort gegaan het om afsydig te bly (in my wĂȘreldse konsep) en ek moet erken dat baie kere moes ek “my gedagtes gevangene hou” omdat daar baie was wat my probeer vertel het dat dit bie moeilik sal wees indien nie onmoontlik nie—vir hom om ‘n persoonlike, intieme verhouding met ons HM te hĂȘ. Ek, dames, het stil gebly, het voort gegaan om God in AL my dinge en situasie na te streef, voort gegaan om my FAL "Vind die Oorvloedige Lewe" kursusse te doen, ter aanvulling met tiendes en die ander skriftuurlike beginsels wat deur Erin gedeel is.

One of the things that really intrigued me was the part of sharing at some point to my EH about the RMI courses that I've been taking and the Restored couple's package that I received some days ago. How to do this with a man who is not openly a Christian and has openly said that he doesn't want to change his "religion" (the Catholic one) when referring to Christians? I didn't want to sound like a fanatic to him, not because I feel ashamed or anything like that (because I have learned to cherish His works and His Love so profoundly that ALL I care about now is my relationship with my HH), neither because I don't want him to feel pressured to "change", because I learned also that it's not me who does it but the Lord, but I have to admit I really wanted to see how the Lord would do it.

Een van die dinge wat my regtig intrigeer het was die deel om op een stadium die punt aan my AM te deel oor die HJH kursusse wat ek besig was om te neem en die herstelde paartjies pakket wat ek ‘n paar dae terug ontvang het. Hoe om dit te doen met ‘n man wat nie openlik ‘n Christen is nie en openlik gesĂȘ het dat hy nie sy geloof wil verander (die Katolieke een) wanneer hy na Christene verwys? Ek wou nie soos ‘n fanatikus vir hom klink nie, nie omdat ek skaam voel of enige iets soos dit nie (omdat ek geleer het om Sy werke en Sy liefde so diepsinnig te koester dat AL waaroor ek omgee nou is my verhouding met my HM), ook omdat ek nie wou hĂȘ dat hy aan druk onderwerp moes wees om te “verander” nie, omdat ek ook geleer het dat dit nie ek is wat dit doen nie maar die Here, maar ek moet erken ek wou regtig sien hoe die Here dit sou doen.    

Well ladies, how I shared about this to my EH, happened in an instant without me having to plan anything. He truly orchestrates ALL: My EH had been having problems with his cell phone and was talking about getting a new one. Yesterday, he sat down with me during lunch and asked me about this purchase, style, etc, but most importantly, he included me in the decision of whether he should buy it or not. I had to leave the dining room (to meet quietly with my HH) so I could hear about what to do and be "his suitable helpmate". Even though it was expensive I felt led to tell him Yes, I think is a good idea.

Wel dames, hoe ek dit met my AM gedeel het, het in ‘n kits gebeur sonder dat ek enige iets hoef te beplan het. Hy orkestreer werklik ALLES: My AM het probleme met sy selfoon gehad en het daaroor gepraat om ‘n nuwe een te kry. Gister, het hy gedurende middagete saam my gesit en my gevra oor hierdie aankoop, styl, ens, maar mees belangrik, hy het my ingesluit in die besluit of hy dit moes koop of nie. Ek moes uit die eetkamer loop (om stilletjies met my HM te ontmoet) so ek kon hoor oor wat om te doen en om “sy gelyke” te wees. Selfs al was dit duur was ek gelei gevoel om vir hom te sĂȘ Ja, ek dink dit is ‘n goeie idee.   

Today, his cell phone arrived in the mail. He told me that he hoped this was a good decision and I felt I had to tell him that he should believe that if he does things correctly and follows good principles (I didn't tell him that this had been having me as his suitable help or anything related to the Bible), he should know that he would be rewarded with a good purchase. And it was at this time that the Lord guided me to share about how I had been able to change by following some "principles" that I had been reading in some courses I had been taking online for a while. I'm quoting Erin again, ladies: "** Remember, don’t get in the way of what the Lord wants to do with your husband, by doing MORE than He wants you to do, nor being afraid of saying anything when it’s time." And I felt this was the time!!! It was the Lord's time because he didn't look surprised or gave me any weird look, he said that this was great and he was glad for me.

Vandag, het die selfoon in die pos arriveer. Hy het vir my gesĂȘ dat hy hoop dit was ‘n goeie besluit en ek het gevoel dat ek hom  moes vertel dat sou hy glo dat as hy dinge korrek doen en goeie beginsels volg (ek het hom nie gesĂȘ dat dit wat omdat hy my het as sy geskikte help het of enige iets wat met die Bybel betrokke het nie), hy moes weet dat hy met ‘n goeie aankoop beloon sou wees. En dit was hoe dat die Here my gelei het om te deel oor hoe ek in staat was om te verander deur sommige “beginsels” te volg waaroor ek in sommige van die kursusse wat ek aanlyn geneem het  te lees. Ek haal Erin weer aan, dames: “** Onthou, moet nie in die pad kom van wat die Here met jou man wil doen nie, deur MEER te doen as wat Hy wil hĂȘ jy moet doen, of om bang te wees om enige iets te sĂȘ wanneer dit tyd is nie!!! Dit was die Here se tyd omdat hy nie verras gelyk het of my enige snaakse kyk gegee het nie, hy het gesĂȘ dit was eersteklas en dat hy bly was vir my.  

Also, Erin said that: "So, if your husband still doesn't know about the help you found, it's time to earnestly seek God and ask Him to provide an opportunity to do so and share about RMI." And this is when I showed him the "A Wise Woman" book and told him that the teachings in this book were helping me remain the changed woman I had become. Also, I said that there was one for him, which I ordered for him in Spanish and that as soon as I got it, I would give to him if he wanted it. He said YES! He was not shocked or anything negative at all. Ladies, as Erin says, don't try to figure it out, LET GO of everything and give it to HIM. Thank You, Lord for Your works in our marriage to give everyone in my home your Abundant Life. Thank You for the testimony that You are building in us to help encourage others. PTL!!!"

Ook, het Erin gesĂȘ dat: “So, as jou man nog steeds nie weet van die hulp wat jy gevind het nie, is dit tyd om God ernstig na te streef en Hom te vra om ‘n geleentheid te voorsien om dit te doen en oor HMI te deel.” En dit is toe wat ek hom die “‘n Wyse Vrou” boek gewys het en hom vertel het dat die leringe in die boek  my gehelp het om die veranderde vrou te bly wat ek geword het. Ook, ek het gesĂȘ dat daar een vir hom was, wat ek vir hom in Spaans bestel het en dat wanneer ek dit kry, ek dit vir hom sou gee as hy dit wou gehad het. Hy het gesĂȘ JA! Hy was nie geskok of enigsins negatief nie. Dames, soos wat Erin sĂȘ, moet nie probeer om dit uit te pluis nie, LAAT GAAN van alles en gee dit vir HOM. Dankie, Here vir Jou werke in ons huwelik om almal in my huis jou Oorvloedige Lewe te gee. Dankie vir die getuienis wat jy besig is om in ons te bou om ander te help aanmoedig. LDH!!!”      

Sara’s HH led her to keep using the term PRINCIPLES, rather than having any “religious” references. Religion has ruined the church, His bride, and it will ruin any chance of your EH wanting a relationship with Him.

Sara se HM het haar gelei om aan te hou om die woord BEGINSELS te gebruik, eerder as om enige “godsdienstige” verwysings te hĂȘ. Godsdiens het die kerk ruĂŻneer, Sy bruid, en dit sal enige kans dat jou AM enige verhouding met Hom wil hĂȘ ook ruĂŻneer.  

Here's another testimony from Bonita in Georgia who is also RESTORED
Hier is nog ‘n getuienis van Bonita in Georgia wie ook HERSTEL is. 

Since being restored and going back to work I have not had the time together with my HH as I had when I was off work, I have truly missed that time. Now I get up earlier and spend time with him because I need it every day.

Vandat ek herstel is en teruggegaan het werk toe het ek nie tyd saam met my HM soos toe ek af was van die werk nie, ek het werklik daardie tyd gemis. Nou staan ek vroeër op en spandeer tyd met hom omdat ek dit elke dag  nodig het.

Riding to work was a battle within itself, which God used for good, answering my prayers to spend more time with Him! Where I live is so crowded the traffic is scary, to say the least. Where I work the main entrance has been under construction so all the hundreds of people that work there and also surrounding businesses are leaving out of ONE entrance. During this time of waiting, I now have time to spend talking to the Lord, listen to music or just sit quietly with Him—and even journal a lesson on my phone (that I read during my lunch hour). At first, I confess I was aggravated because it takes at least a half hour to get just out the parking lot— but now I understand that He was giving me time to spend with Him and now I’m grateful! I’m so thankful that He showed me a way to spend more time with Him—showing me that many of the trials are just Him giving me more time and more of Him.

Deur werk toe te bestuur was ‘n stryd op sigself, wat God ten goede gebruik het, en my gebede beantwoord het om meer tyd saam Hom te spandeer! Waar ek bly is dit so stampvol die verkeer is skrikwekkend, om die minste te sĂȘ. Waar ek werk is die hoof ingang onder konstruksie so al die honderde mense wat daar werk en ook die omliggende besighede verlaat die gebou uit EEN ingang. Gedurende hierdie wag periode, moet ek nou tyd spandeer om met die Here te praat, musiek te luister of net stil saam Hom te sit— en selfs ‘n les op my selfoon joernaal (wat ek gedurende my etensuur lees). In die begin, moet ek bieg ek was vererg omdat dit ten minste ‘n half uur neem net om uit die parkeer terrein te kom—maar nou verstaan ek dat Hy my meer tyd gegee het om met Hom te spandeer en nou is ek dankbaar! Ek is so dankbaar dat Hy my ‘n manier gewys het om meer tyd saam Hom te spandeer—en my wys dat baie van die beproewings is net Hy wat my meer tyd en meer van Hom gee.  

Just as you SG "seek God" for when and how to spend time (or doing anything at all) prior to your marriage being restored, now is the time to ask Him to carve out those times now! Just like a new mother needs time to rest and recover and feel rejuvenated, so too does a newly restored woman. So SG, trust God, and then watch for those unique opportunities that the Lord revealed to Bonita 🙂

Net soos jy GN “God nastreef” vir wanneer en hoe om tyd saam Hom te spandeer (of enige iets te doen) voor jou huwelik herstel is, nou is die tyd om Hom te vra om daardie tye nou uit te kerf! Net soos ‘n nuwe moeder tyd nodig het om te rus en herstel en rejuveneer, so ook doen ‘n nuut herstelde vrou. So GN, vertrou op God, en kyk uit vir daardie unieke geleenthede wat die Here aan Bonita openbaar het 🙂

The GOOD NEWS
Die GOEIE NUUS

So, if your husband still doesn't know about the help you found, it's time to earnestly seek God and ask Him to provide an opportunity to do so and share about RMI. Why? Because, 1 Corinthians 14:35 says—

So, as jou man nog steeds nie weet van die hulp wat jy gevind het nie, is dit tyd om God ywerig na te streef en Hom te vra om ‘n geleentheid te voorsien om dit te doen en te deel oor HMI. Hoekom? Omdat, 1 KorintiĂ«rs 14:35 sĂȘ—

“If [women] desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church.”

“As hulle [vrouens] iets te wete wil kom, moet hulle tuis hulle eie mans vra, want dit is lelik vir ‘n vrou om in die erediens te praat.”

For instance, an opportunity could come about when it comes to finances. Many times a husband who either wants to control the finances again or wants you to continue paying the bills and he gives his paycheck to you, may not understand about your new storehouse. So "asking your husband" "at home" about your desire to continue to tithe to your storehouse from your paycheck (that spiritually fed you so that you changed and healed and where you will continue being fed) will open up the opportunity to not only share about RMI but also the verse you can show him.

By voorbeeld, ‘n geleentheid kan kom oor finansies. Baie kere sal ‘n man wie of die finansies weer wil beheer of wil hĂȘ jy moet voort gaan om die rekeninge te betaal en hy sy betaal tjek vir jou gee, mag nie verstaan oor jou nuwe voorraadkamer nie. So “deur jou man te vra”  “by die huis” oor jou begeerte om voort te gaan om aan jou voorraadkamer ‘n tiende te gee ut jou betaal tjek (wat jou spiritueel gevoed het sodat jy verander en genees is en waar jy voort sal gaan om gevoed te word) sal ‘n geleentheid oop maak om nie net oor jou HM te deel nie maar die vers sal hom ook help. 

If you sense he’s not ready (but please don’t give into fear of what He’ll say should it be time to be open with him), be sure you continue to pay your tithe.

As jy ‘n voorgevoel het dat hy nie gereed is nie (maar moet asseblief nie ingee aan vrees oor wat Hy sal sĂȘ sou dit tyd wees om oop met hom te wees), wees seker dat jy voort gaan om jou tiende te betaal.

This may be when you give him his complimentary Wise Man Workbook (that you can explain is the "Companion" book to what you've been trained by), which will also help him to become your spiritual leader. You may even let him know that there is a chapter in the first book you read, and the men have a lot of resources on the men's site.

Dit mag wees wanneer jy vir hom sy komplimentĂȘre Wyse Man Werkboek gee (wat jy kan verduidelik is die “Metgesel” boek waarmee jy opgelei is), wat hom ook sal help om jou spirituele leier te word. Jy mag hom selfs laat weet dat daar ‘n hoofstuk in die eerste boek wat jy gelees het, en die mans het baie hulpbronne op die mans se werf.  

Also to understand about tithing and your storehouse, here is Chapter 17 for you to study or give to your husband should he not understand tithing.

Ook om te verstaan oor tiendes en jou voorrraadkamer, hier is Hoofstuk 17 vir jou om te bestudeer of om vir jou man te gee om te studeer sou hy nie tiendes verstaan nie. . 

If your husband isn’t attending a church, then you can let him know that some men tithe here after studying A Wise Man. Others just encourage their wives to continue to tithe where they’re being spiritually fed but are not ready to begin tithing. One woman's husband has been so faithful to tithe and #Mona continues to send incredible praise reports due to the ongoing protection from the devourer! 

As jou man nie ‘n kerk bywoon nie, dan laat jy hom weet dat van die mans hulle tiendes hier gee na hulle ‘n Wyse Man bestudeer het. Ander bemoedig net hulle vrouens om voort te gaan om hulle tiende te gee waar hulle spiritueel gevoed word maar nie gereed is om hulle tiendes te begin gee nie. Een vrou se man was so getrou om sy tiende te gee en  #Mona gaan voort om ongelooflike lofverslae te stuur te wyte aan die voortdurende beskerming teen die verslinder!

Again, God took care of this for me when we attended the seminar I mentioned above. We began attending the church where I started RMI as a family because my husband was so impressed with the pastor and the changes in me, this is where my husband said he would tithe.

Weer, het God vir my daarvoor gesorg toe ons die  seminaar bygewoon het wat ek hier bo genoem het. Ons het begin om kerk by te woon waar ek HMI begin het as ‘n familie omdat my man so   beĂŻndruk was met die pastoor en die verandringe in my, dit is waar my man gesĂȘ het hy sy tiende sou gee.

So again, at this point in your Restoration Journey, to complete what He started, and keep alert for when He wants you to share A Wise Man with your husband. But to make that happen, we want to encourage you to stop focusing on your husband or your marriage or any of the usual trials you’re going through as a newly restored couple. Instead—focus on your relationship with the LORD, looking to Him as your Husband—since this is the reason He allowed this crisis to happen, remember?

So weer, op hierdie stadium in jou Herstel Reis, om te voltooi wat Hy begin het, en aandagtig te wees vir wanneer Hy wil hĂȘ jy ‘n Wyse Man met jou man moet deel. Maar om dit te maak gebeur, wil ons jou aanmoedig om op te hou om op jou man en jou huwelik te fokus of enige van die gewone beproewings waardeur jy gaan as ‘n nuut herstelde paartjie. In plaas daarvan—fokus op jou verhouding met die HERE, kyk na Hom as jou Man—aangesien dit die rede is wat Hy die krisis in jou lewe toegelaat het, onthou? 

“Fear not, for you will not be put to shame [if things are going along as you expected]

“Moenie bang wees nie, jy sal nie weer in die skande kom nie [as dinge aangaan soos wat jy verwag het]

And do not feel humiliated, for you will not be disgraced; [because this happens with all restored couples at first]

Moenie so verleë daar staan nie, jy sal nie weer verneder word nie; [omdat dit gebeur met alle herstelde paartjies in die begin]

“For your Husband is [still] your Maker, Whose name is the Lord of hosts; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, Who is called the God of all the earth.

“Hy wat jou gemaak het, is jou man, sy Naam is die Here die Almagtige. Die Heilige van Israel is jou Verlosser; Hy word die God van die hele wĂȘreld genoem.

“'For the Lord has called you [and still want you as His], Like a wife forsaken and grieved in spirit, Even like a wife of one’s youth when she is rejected [because remember the enemy has not given up],' Says your God" Isaiah 54:4-6.

“‘Jy is ‘n verstote en bitter bedroefde vrou, maar die Here roep jou terug, want hoe kan ‘n man sy eie vrou vergeet? [omdat onthou die vyand het nie opgegee nie],’ SĂȘ jou God” Jesaja 54:4-6

"Instead of your shame you will have a double portion [now you have 2 husbands, an EH but even better, a HH], and instead of humiliation, YOU SHOULD shout for joy over YOUR portion. Therefore they will possess a double portion in their land, Everlasting joy will be theirs [if you just stay the course, and keep your eyes on Him].

“In plaas van vernedering sal julle twee keer soveel besittings hĂȘ as tevore [nou het jy 2 mans, ‘n AM maar selfs beter ‘n HM , in plaas van minagting SAL JULLE lof ontvang oor wat JULLE besit. Julle sal in julle land twee keer soveel besit as tevore en julle sal altyd vreugde hĂȘ [as jy op koers bly, en jou oĂ« op Hom hou].  

And you will say, once you've experience this is

En jy sal sĂȘ, sodra jy dit ervaar het...

"I will rejoice greatly in the Lord, My soul will exult in my God; For He has clothed me with garments of salvation, He has wrapped me with a robe of righteousness, As a bridegroom decks himself with a garland, And as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. For as the earth brings forth its sprouts, and as a garden causes the things sown in it to spring up, so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to spring up before all the nations"—Isaiah: 61:7-11

“Ek is bly oor die Here, en juig oor my God, want Hy het my gered, vir my oorwinnaarsklere aangetrek. Ek is soos ‘n bruidegom met ‘n priesterkroon op, soos ‘n bruid met haar juwele aan. Soos die grond plante laat uitspruit, soos die plantein ‘n tuin vrugte gee, so gee die Here my God die oorwinning en laat Hy al die nasies luister na sy loflied tot sy eer”—Jesaja: 61:10,11 

The only way you will falter or stumble is IF you take your eyes off the Lord and He no longer is your HH who you go to first for everything. Though your EH may be demanding your attention, remember, it wasn’t you who did anything but fall in love with the Lord—trusting Him as you lovingly reacted to trials and insults and anything else the enemy will want to throw at you to distract you.

Die enigste manier wat jy sal wankel of struikel is AS jy jou oĂ« van die Here af neem en Hy nie meer jou HM is na wie jy eerste toe gaan vir alles nie. Alhoewel  jou AM dalk veeleisend mag wees vir jou aandag, onthou, dit was nie jy wat enige iets gedoen het behalwe om op die HERE verlief te raak nie—op Hom vertrou soos wat jy liefdevol reageer op beproewings en beledigings en enige iets anders wat die vyand na jou toe wil gooi om jou aandag af te trek.  

Again, it was God who restored your marriage because you began to love His Son as your Husband. Take a moment to read what Atarah shares in her awesome testimony of how trials began to happen, but then she turned back to the Lord.

Weer, dit was God wat jou huwelik herstel het omdat jy weer begin het om lief te word vir Sy Seun as jou Man. Neem ‘n oomblik om te lees wat Atarah in haar ongelooflike getuienis deel van hoe beproewings begin het om te gebeur, maar toe het sy weer teruggekeer na die Here toe.

“It was Better for Me Then than Now”
“Dit was Beter vir My Toe as Nou”

It has been a month since I experienced a restored marriage and I have been very happy, my husband and I are so in love. It is everything and more than what my heart desired for a restored marriage. As happy as I am, there has been something missing and I know all too well what it is... My First Husband. My heart, mind and spirit (in the busyness of work, my home, my husband, my daughter, washing, cooking and tidying) longs for, pants for, my Husband and we both want to get back what I had together: the time alone with Him, speaking to Him, hearing Him speak to me. Once you know THIS awesome HUSBAND you cannot go back.

Dit is ‘n maand sedert ek ‘n herstelde huwelik ervaar het en ek ek is baie gelukkig, my man en ek is so verlief. Dit is alles en meer as wat my hart begeer het vir ‘n herstelde huwelik. So gelukkig soos wat ek is, daar was iets kort en ek weet te wel wat dit is
 My Eerste Man. My hart, verstand en gees (in die bedrywigheid van my werk, my huis, my man, my dogter, was, kook en opruim) smag vir, dors vir, my Man en ons wil albei terug hĂȘ wat ons saam gehad het: die tyd alleen met Hom, praat met Hom, hoor Hom met my praat. Sodra jy HIERDIE ontsagwkkende MAN ken kan jy nie teruggaan nie. 

When you SEEK HIM, He will show you as He showed me. As I read the "What Now" that was sent to me from RMI after submitting my restored marriage testimony. This is what the Lord showed me and it is so funny, LOL, because before I came to RMI I used to pray this same scripture for my then estranged husband, desperately, feverishly—when he was living with the ow!!

Wanneer jy HOM NASTREEF, Sal Hy jou wys soos wat Hy my gewys het. Soos wat ek die “Wat Nou” lees wat vir my gestuur is van HMI af nadat ek my herstelde huwelik getuienis ingedien het. Dit is wat die Here my gewys het en dit is so snaaks, lH, (lag hardop) omdat voordat ek na HMI toe gekom het het ek dieselfde Skriflesing vir my toe vervreemde man gebid, desperaat, ywerig—toe hy by die av gebly het!! 

Hosea 2:7 “She (I used to put he or my husband) will run after her lovers, but she won’t catch them. She will search for them, but she won’t find them. Then she will say, ‘I’ll go back to my first husband. Things were better for me than they are now.”

Hosea 2:7 “En as sy [ek het gesit hy of my man] dan haar minnaars probeer opsoek en hulle nie raakloop nie, hulle soek en hulle nie kry nie, sal sy dalk sĂȘ: “Ek sal na my eie man teruggaan, want ek was by hom beter versorg as nou.

Back then, I used to pray desperately for my husband, praying that as he ran after his lovers he would not find them, that he would look for them and not find them. AND NOW I KNOW. These scriptures were for me, yes me!! What struck me was these words from the verses above "I will go back to my husband, it was better for me then than now"!

Daardie tyd, het ek desperaat vir my man gebid, gebid dat soos wat hy agter sy minnaresse aanhardloop dat hy hulle nie sou vind nie, dat hy hulle sal soek maar nie vind nie. EN NOU WEET EK. Hierdie skriflesings was vir my, ja vir my!! Wat my bygeval het was die woorde uit die verse hier bo “Ek sal na my eie man teruggaan, want ek was by hom beter versorg as nou”!

During my time of being divorced, looking back it was "better for me then than now", my relationship with my Husband was idyllic, I lived for Him, I spent so much time with Him. I loved Him and He loved me; it was such a special time, it was glorious, it was marvelous and it was awesome 🙂 🙂 I loved it!!!!

Gedurende die tyd van my egskeiding, as ek terugkyk was ek “ beter by hom versorg as nou” , my verhouding met my Man was iddilies, ek het vir Hom gelewe, ek het soveel tyd saam Hom spandeer. Ek was lief vir Hom en Hy vir my; dit was ‘n spesiale tyd, dit was glorieryk, dit was wonderlik en dit was ontsagwekkend  🙂 🙂 ek was gek daaroor!!!! 

Ladies, I want to encourage you to enjoy your time with your Husband (while it lasts), because before you know it, if you fall in love with your HH and let go of your EH, you will be restored to your earthly husband and long for your time you once had only for Him.

Dames, ek wil jou aanmoedig om die tyd met jou Man te geniet (terwyl dit hou), omdat voor jy dit weet, as jy op jou HM verlief raak en jou AM laat gaan, sal jy herstel wees aan jou aardse man en smag na die tyd wat jy eens op ‘n tyd net vir Hom gehad het. 

I praise God for showing me how better it was for me then than now, because my attention and focus was Him and how He taught me through RMI to put Him first. “Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first.” Revelation 2:4.

Ek loof God dat Hy my gewys het dat dit beter vir my tie is as nou. Omdat my aandag en fokus was Hy en hoe Hy my deur HMI hulpbronne geleer het om Hom eerste te plaas. “ Maar Ek het dít teen julle: julle het My nie meer so lief soos in die begin nie.” Die Openbaring 2:4.

God is so awesome and so in tune with you when you pray, as He shows you great and unsearchable things.

God is so ontsagwekkend en so in harmonie met jou wanneer jy bid, soos wat Hy jou groot en onverstaanbare dinge.

Jeremiah 33:3 “Call to Me and I will answer you and show you great and unsearchable things you do not know.”

Jeremia 33:3 “Roep My aan, Ek sal jou antwoord en jou vertel van groot en onverstaanbare dinge waarvan jy nie weet nie.” 

So I'm happy to run and jump into my Husband’s arms, His love is amazing!!

So ek is gelukkig om te hardloop en in my Man se arms te spring, Sy liefde is ontsagwekkend!!

Read "It was Me" REGARDING FEAR 

Lees “Dit was Ek” AANGAANDE VREES

Our Beloved is so good and so amazing and so faithful! I confess that during the time my restoration seems to be falling apart in the beginning, I took matters into my own hands and helped the Lord, thinking that if I get a job, EH wouldn’t ask me to move out. It was all flesh and driven by fear. And of course it didn’t work out or changed my EH’s mind, but instead only pushed him away. Oh! What a lesson and a reminder for me that He does not need my help and to let go.

Ons Beminde is so goed en so ontsagwekkend en so getrou! Ek bieg dat in die begin toe dit gelyk het asof my herstel besig was om uit mekaar te val, het ek gedurende daardie tyd sake in my eie hande geneem en die Here gehelp, ek het gedink as ek werk kry, sou my AM my nie vra om uit te trek nie. Dit was alles die vlees en gedrywe deur vrees. En natuurlik het dit nie uitgewerk nie of my AM se gedagtes verander nie, maar in plaas daarvan het dit hom weggestoot. O! Wat ‘n les en ‘n herinnering vir my dat Hy nie my hulp nodig het nie en om te laat gaan.    

As always He turns it for good. It was this time that the Lord was taking me higher. I thank Him for bringing me again to that place of surrendering to Him, letting go of my restoration, my EH, my situation. To that place where it is His peace that rules in my heart instead of fear. To that place where my eyes are fixed on Him and I am not shaken. Thank You, Lord, for helping me let go. I remember the time I went to the park and shared with Him how nice the community we lived in is and how I would love to find work around here, asking Him to place it in my EH’s heart. In my mind, I was imagining working and living in a new apartment, just the two of Us and driving to work every day together. I was excited of the possibilities! I gave it to our Beloved. The Lord turned EH’s heart towards me a few months later.

Soos altyd keer Hy dit om ten goede. Dit was gedurende hierdie tyd wat die Here my hoĂ«r gevat het. Ek bedank Hom dat Hy my weer op daardie plek gebring het van oorgawe aan Hom, te laat gaan van my herstel, my AM, my situasie. Na daardie plek waar dit Sy vrede is wat my hart regeer in plaas van vrees. Na daardie plek toe waar my oĂ« op Hom gerig is en ek nie geskud is nie. Dankie, Here, dat jy my gehelp het om te laat gaan. Ek onthou die tyd wat ek park toe gegaan het en met Hom gedeel het hoe goed die gemeenskap is waarin ons lewe en hoe ek daarvan sal hou om werk hier rondom te kry, ek het Hom gevra om dit in my AM se hart te plaas. In my gedagtes, het ek my verbeel dat ek werk en bly in ‘n nuwe woonstel, net die twee van Ons en dat ons elke dag saam werk toe ry. Ek was opgewonde oor die moontlikhede! Ek het dit aan ons Beminde gegee. Die Here het maande later AM na my toe teruggekeer.  

I praise Him that the negative emotions are gone. PTL and replaced with His peace and assurance that everything will work out as He has planned. Thank You, Beloved."

Ek loof Hom dat die negatiewe emosies weg is. PDH en vervang is met Sy vrede en assuransie dat alles sal uitwerk soos wat Hy beplan het. Dankie, Beminde.”

If Joy's HH wants her to have a job, she will get one, but if her HH wants her to remain at home, then even being obedient and applying for one, will not bring one about. By trying to obey, by trying to appease, by trying to make sure your EH stays “happy” with you, we each will fall into a very deep ditch—the one it took us so long to climb our way out of.

As Joy se HM wil hĂȘ dat sy ‘n werk moet hĂȘ, sal sy een kry, maar as haar HM wil hĂȘ sy moet by die huis bly, dan selfs om gehoorsaam te wees en vir een aansoek te doen, sal nie een teweeg bring ni. Maar om te probeer gehoorsaam, om te probeer om te bevredig, te probeer om seker te maak jou AM bly “gelukkig” met jou, val ons elkeen in ‘n diep sloot—die een wat ons so lank geneem het om uit te klim.

REMAIN FAITHFUL TO HIM
BLY GETROU AAN HOM

So should you become spiritually unfaithful again, turning to others for help or trying to be everything to your EH, He will have no recourse but to again remove your lover and friend.

So sou jy weer spiritueel ontrou word, en na ander keer vir hulp of probeer om Alles vir jou AM te wees, sal Hy geen keuse hĂȘ as om weer jou vriende en jou bure  ver van jou af te laat staan.

Revelation 2:4— "But I have this against you, that you have [again] left your first Love."

Die Openbaring 2:4—”Maar Ek het dít teen julle: julle het My nie meer so lief soos in die begin nie.

“You have removed lover and friend far from me; My acquaintances are in darkness”—Psalm 88:18

“U laat my vriende en my bure ver van my af staan, die duisternis van die dood is my geselskap”—Psalm 88:8

“You have removed my acquaintances far from me; You have made me an object of loathing to them; I am shut up and cannot go out”—Psalm 88:8

“U laat my bekendes ver van my af staan en maak my vir hulle iets afskuweliks; ek sit vasgevang en kan nie uitkom nie”—Psalm 88:9

“She will pursue her lovers, but she will not overtake them; and she will seek them, but will not find them. Then she will say, ‘I will go back to my first Husband, for it was better for me then than now!’”— Hosea 2:7

“En as sy dan haar minnaars probeer opsoek en hulle nie raakloop nie, hulle soek en nie kry nie, sal sy dalk sĂȘ: “Ek sal na my eie man toe teruggaan, want ek was by hom beter versorg as nou.” 

"The king’s heart is like channels of water in the hand of the LORD; He turns it wherever He wishes"—Proverbs 21:1

“Die wil van die koning staan onder gesag van die Here; soos ‘n stroom water lei Hy dit soos Hy verkies”—Spreuke 21:1 

As long as you keep the Lord first in your heart, and He truly is FIRST in your life, THEN you will see the Lord turn your husband's heart, not only back to you, but more importantly back to Him. 🙂

Solank as wat jy die Here EERSTE hou in jou hart, en Hy is werklik EERSTE in jou lewe, DAN sal jy sien hoe die Here jou man se hart draai, nie net terug na jou toe nie, maar meer belangrik terug na Hom toe. 🙂

In addition, once the Lord has tested you, and He knows He truly is FIRST in your life, THEN you will see the Lord begin to heal and/or deal with your husband. You can't fix him, he can't even fix himself so don't expect him to change or to “work” on anything! God will need to change your husband just as He changed you.

Ter aanvulling, sodra die Here jou getoets het, en Hy weet Hy is werklik EERSTE in jou lewe, DAN sal jy sien hoe die Here begin genees en/of afreken met jou man. Jy kan hom nie kan regmaak nie, hy kan homself nie eens regmaak nie so moet nie verwag dat hy moet verander of aan enige iets “werk“ nie! God sal jou man moet verander net soos wat Hy jou verander het. 

What may be helpful so you don’t “over do” as a wife, is to reread A Wise Woman Chapter 9, “Helper Suitable” under the section “Who Should Be the Spiritual Leader?”

Wat helpvol mag wees sodat jy dit nie “oordoen” as ‘n vrou nie, is om ‘n Wyse Vrou Hoofstuk 9, “Helper Geskik”weer te lees onder die afdeling “Wie Behoort die Spirituele Leier te Wees?”

Many of us have wanted to be such a good helper that we do everything for our husband. We do, do, do. This will actually rob your husband of blessings, and at the same time, rip the manliness out of him. We make the decisions, do everything around the house and in the yard, and help provide part of the income. We then are surprised that with all this free time, he finds himself a nice helpless woman to care for.

Baie van ons wou graag so ‘n goeie helper wees dat ons alles doen vir ons man. Ons doen, doen, doen. Dit sal eintlik jou man beroof van seĂ«ninge, en ter selfdertyd, die manklikheid uit hom uit neem. Ons maak die besluite, doen alles rondom die huis en in die erf, en help om deel van die inkomste te voorsien. Ons is dan verras dat met al hierdie vrye tyd, vind hy homself ‘n mooi hulpelose vrou na wie hy kan omsien. 

If we have taken on something our husband should be doing, we must pray that the Lord will change the situation. When we pray, many times we will see a mini-catastrophe occur and our husband will need to rescue us. However, this is actually a good thing if we don’t rob him from being the savior for us and our family. Don’t try to fix it or tell him how to fix it – leave it alone! We must realize that this catastrophe has occurred because we have been operating in the wrong role, a role we were not designed for. However, you should never cause a crisis; wait for the Lord to move – stop manipulating! Don't go back to your old ways.

As ons iets aangevat het wat ons mans veronderstel was om te doen, moet ons bid dat die Here die situasie sal verander. Wanneer ons bid, sal ons baie keer ‘n mini-katastrofe sien gebeur en ons mans sal ons moet red. Nietemin dit is eintlik ‘n goeie ding as ons hom nie beroof om  ‘n redder te wees vir ons en ons familie. Moet nie probeer om dit reg te maak nie of vir hom te sĂȘ hoe om dit reg te maak nie—los dit uit! Ons moet besef dat hierdie katasofe plaasgevind het omdat ons in die verkeerde rol opgetree het, ‘n rol wat ons nie ontwerp was voor nie. Nietemin, jy moet nooit ‘n krisis veroorsaak nie; wag vir die Here om te beweeg — hou op om te manipuleer! Moet nie teruggaan na jou ou maniere nie.  

Again, read more in A Wise Woman Chapter 9, “Helper Suitable” under the section “Who Should Be the Spiritual Leader?” and don't miss the testimony!) Sacrifice, instead of obedience, made Erin a martyr!

Weer, lees meer in ‘n Wyse Vrou Hoofstuk 9, “Helper Geskik” onder die afdeling “Wie Behoort die Spirituele Leier te Wees? En moet nie die getuienis mis nie!) Offerandes, in plaas van gehoorsaamheid, het van Erin ‘n martelaar gemaak.  

The ONLY way He will begin to do what He needs to do to bring about the changes in your husband, and complete your restoration, as we said, is for you to be living as the Lord's bride, looking to Him for every need (like having ample time to spend with Him) and what He (as your Heavenly Husband) wants you to do while you follow His lead. 

Die ENIGSTE manier wat Hy sal begin om die veranderinge aan te bring in jou man, en die herstel te voltooi, soos wat ons gesĂȘ, is vir hou om te lewe as die Here se bruid, en om na hom te kyk vir elke behoefte (soos om genoeg tyd te hĂȘ om saam Hom te spandeer) en wat Hy (as jou Hemelse Man) wil hĂȘ jy moet doen om Sy leiding te volg.      

If you want to continue and allow the Lord to begin working in your husband's life, so you are equally yoked be sure you:

As jy wil voortgaan en die Here toelaat om in jou man se lewe te begin werk , sodat julle aan dieselfde juk trek wees seker dat jy:

  1. Continue to focus on your relationship with the Lord, not on your RESTORED marriage or your husband (what he does or does not do). (See what ~ Michele said below)
  2. Voort Gaan om op jou verhouding met die Here te fokus, nie op jou HERSTELDE huwelik of jou man, (wat hy doen of nie doen nie). (Sien wat ~ Michelle hier onder gesĂȘ het)
  3. Continue to READ your Encourager and continue to submit Praise Reports, even if you haven't felt like praising Him. Remember, when we praise, the enemy won't stick around!
  4. Gaan voort om jou Bemoediger te LEES en gaan voort om Lofverslae in te dien, self al voel jy nie lus om Hom te loof nie. Onthou, wanneer ons loof, sal die vyand nie rondhang nie!  
  5. No matter how far you've come, BEGIN or continue your Fellowship Courses and know that GOD has Restored your Marriage, you didn’t restore it.
  6. Maak nie saak hoe ver jy gekom het nie, BEGIN of gaan voort met jou Fellowship Kursusse en weet dat GOD jou Huwelik Herstel het, jy het dit nie herstel nie.
  7. Also, you need to make room for your husband to hear from God while you focus on Becoming a Minister—because that's why He restored your marriage—to help others!!
  8. Ook, jy moet plek maak vir jou man om van God te hoor terwyl jy fokus om ‘n Minister te Word—omdat dit is hoekom Hy jou huwelik herstel het—om ander te help!!

Becoming a Minister

Word ‘n Minister

Becoming an Evangelist

Word ‘n Evangelis  

Becoming a Prayer Warrior

Word ‘n Gebeds Krygsman

  1. CONTINUE tithing to your storehouse.
  2. GAAN VOORT om jou tiende aan jou voorraadkamer te gee

ROBBED
BEROOF

Malachi 3:8–10—

Maleagi 3:8-10

“Will a man rob God? Yet you are robbing Me! But you say, ‘How have we robbed Thee?’ In tithes and offerings. You are cursed with a curse, for you are robbing Me, the whole nation of you!”

“Sal ‘n mens werklik vir God beroof? Tog beroof julle My. Julle vra: “Waarvan beroof ons U?” Van tiendes en offergawes. Daar rus alreeds  ‘n vloek op julle en tog bly julle My beroof; die hele nasie doen dit."

Malachi 3:10-12—

Maleagi 3:10-12—

“‘Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be [spiritual] food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says the LORD of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows. Then I will rebuke the devourer for you, so that it will not destroy the fruits of the ground; nor will your vine in the field cast its grapes,” says the LORD of hosts. “All the nations will call you blessed, for you shall be a delightful land,” says the LORD of hosts.”

“Bring die volle tiende na die voorraadkamer toe sodat daar iets te ete in my huis kan wees, en toets my hierin sĂȘ die Here  die Almagtige. Toets My of Ek nie die vensters van die hemel vir julle sal oopmaak en vir julle reĂ«n sal uitgiet, meer as wat julle kan gebruik nie. Ek sal die sprinkane keer dat hulle nie die oes op julle  land vernietig nie, en dat julle wingerede nie sonder vrugte is nie, sĂȘ die Here die Almagtige. Dan sal al die nasies julle as gelukkige mense beskou; julle sal in ‘n begeerlike land woon, sĂȘ die Here die Almagtige.

Another way the enemy is eager to rob you of your restoration is failing to tithe to your storehouse. This can become a challenge if your husband returns and takes over the finances.

‘n Ander manier waar die vyand gretig is om jou te beroof is om te faal om ‘n tiende aan jou voorraaadkamer te betaal. Dit kan ‘n uitdaging word wanneer jou man terugkom en die finansies oorneem.

When my husband returned, he took over our finances, which is when I had to seek God to know how to continue tithing. Amazingly, as I said, the Lord had me sign up for a Seminar before my husband returned. And rather than moving from the narrow road that led to my restoration, and falling into the ditch of becoming a super-submissive, aka doormat, I explained that I needed to go to the seminar (to continue being the wife and mother he and our children deserved so the "old Erin" didn't return). In utter shock, not only did my husband say it was okay to go to the seminar I signed up for, BUT he asked if he could go with me!!

Toe my man terug gekom het, het hy ons finansies oorgeneem, toe moes ek God nastreef om te weet hoe om voort te gaan om my tiende te betaal. Wonderbaarlik, soooos wat ek gesĂȘ het, het die Here my laat opteken vir ‘n Seminaar voor my man teruggekom het. En eerder as om te beweeg van die nou pad wat tot my herstel gelei het, en in die sloot te val om ‘n super-onderdanige, aka deurmat te word, het ek verduidelik dat ek nodig gehad het om na die seminaar toe te gaan (om voort te gaan om die vrou en moeder te word wat hy en ons kinders verdien het sodat die “ou” Erin nie sou terugkeer nie). In uiterste skok, nie net het my man gesĂȘ dit is reg dat ek na die seminaar toe kan gaan nie, MAAR hy het gevra of hy saam my kon gaan!!   

Yet, again as I mentioned, due to it being the "advanced" seminar, I was initially told No, then they contacted me and said that they were going to try in just this one city to see if it was necessary that the Basic Training Seminar needed to be taken first AND that due to it being a "trial" he could go for free!! I know this was God not only giving me the desires of my heart to be able to go, but also due to my faithfully tithing—the devourer was rebuked.

Tog, weer soos ek genoem het, aangesien dit ‘n “gevorderde” seminaar was, was ek aanvanklik gesĂȘ Nee, toe het hulle my gekontak en gesĂȘ hulle gaan in net hierdie een stad probeer om te sien of dit noodsaaklik is dat die Basiese Opleiding Seminaar eerste geneem moet word en dat aangesien dit ‘n “proef” was dat hy gratis kon gaan!! Ek het geweet dat dit God was wat nie net vir my die begeertes van my hart gegee het om my in staat te stel om te gaan nie, maar ook omdat ek getrou my tiende betaal het—was die verslinder tereggewys.  

In the Advanced Seminar my husband learned about tithing to our storehouse and also trusting God for our fertility—that resulted in not just Tara, but my 3 Restoration babies! It also meant that we tithed as a couple/family beginning March 1991 (the weekend of the seminar is when my husband tithed for the very first time, tithing to the seminar we attended, since he wasn't attending a church yet).

In die Gevorderde Seminaar het my man geleer oor tiendes aan ons vorraadkamer en ook om op God te vertrou vir vrugbaarheid—en die resultaat was nie net Tara nie, maar my 3 Herstel babas!  Dit het ook beteken dat ons as ‘n paartjie/familie ons tiendes betaal het van die begin van Maart 1991 (die naweek van die seminaar is toe my man vir die eerste keer ‘n tiende gegee het, aan die seminaar wat ons bygewoon het, aangesien hy nog nie ‘n kerk bygewoon het nie).   

Also, let me share that just as relationships in crisis get our attention as women, finances are what often get a man’s attention. This means, be ready for when financial issues hit home. AND then be sure you step back, allowing the full effect to rest on you EH where He wants it to be. Take a look at a man’s shoulders and at ours as women (even women who work out excessively could never compare to a man who works out).

Ook, laat ek deel dat net soos wat verhoudings in krisis ons aandag as vrouens kry, is dit finansies wat dikwels ‘n man se aandag trek. Dit beteken, wees gereed wanneer finansiĂ«le krisisse ontstaan. EN wees seker om terug te tree, en toe te laat dat die volle effek op jou AM rus waar Hy wil hĂȘ dit met wees. Kyk na ‘n man se skouers en ons sin as vrouens (selfs vrouens wat oordadig oefen kan nooit met ‘n man sin vergelyk word nie. 

Use your EH as a reminder to NOT make the mistake of lifting the burden placed on your husband by GOD. If we do, the weight will crush us, cause us to lose our gentleness (which is far more important to an EH) and use the time to remain closer to your HH, sitting close to Him watching what GOD plans to do.

Gebruik jou AM as ‘n herinnering om NIE die fout te maak om die las wat op jou man geplaas is deur GOD, te lig nie. As ons dit doen, sal die gewig ons vermorsel, veroorsaak dat ons ons sagmoedigheid verloor (wat ver meer belangrik is vir ‘n  AM) en gebruik die tyd om nader aan jou HM te bly, sit na aan Hom en hou dop wat GOD beplan   

More TESTIMONIES
Nog Getuienisse

Lota, restored since 2003, tithes from her husband's business, we assume, because she pays all the family's and business's bills. Nevertheless, we can tell she’s bringing the whole tithe, and as a result, they are not only happily restored, but, WOW, after this Lota’s Spanish Ministry began flourishing!!

Lota, herstel sedert 2003, het tiendes van haar man se besigheid betaal, neem ons aan, omdat sy al die familie en besigheids rekeninge betaal. Nietemin, ons kan sĂȘ sy bring die hele tiende, en as ‘n resultaat, is hulle nie net gelukkig en herstel nie, maar , WOW, na dit het Lota se Spaanse Ministerie begin floreer!!   

Another woman, Cathy, ended up choosing Plan B of restoring her marriage and actually didn't wait for her restoration; sadly, she remarried someone else. However, she continued tithing to RMI for years. Later she confessed to being completely miserable (due to not waiting for her husband to return). Then a crisis hit their family and we felt led to ask her about giving her husband A Wise Man. She did and he devoured it, and soon afterwards, he became not just her spiritual leader, but also a spiritual leader to her son-in-law whose wife (Cathy’s daughter) left him. Together the men began studying A Wise Man and both began tithing to RMI because they said it was their spiritual storehouse. Her son got his job back and we heard his marriage was restored too. As for Cathy, she wrote recently how amazingly they’ve been doing financially, and for the first time, they purchased a beautiful home!

Nog ‘n vrou, Cathy, het opgeeindig om Plan B te kies van haar huwelik herstel en het eintlik nie gewag vir haar herstel nie; droewig, het sy met iemand anders getrou. Nietemin, sy het voort gegaan om vir jare aan HMI haar tiendes te betaal. Later het sy gebieg dat sy heeltemal misluk is (aangesien sy nie gewag het vir haar man om terug te kom nie). Toe het ‘n krisis haar familie getref en was ons gelei om haar te vra om vir haar man ‘n Wyse Man te gee. Sy het en hy het dit verorber, en binnekort, het hy nie net haar spirituele leier geword nie, maar ook die spirituele leier van haar skoonseun wie se vrou (Cathy se dogter) hom verlaat het. Saam het die mans ‘n Wyse Man begin studeer en albei het begin om ‘n tiende aan HMI te  betaal omdat hulle gesĂȘ het dit was hulle spirituele voorraadkamer. Haar seun het sy werk terug gekry en ons het gehoor sy huwelik was ook herstel. Cathy, het onlangs geskryf hoe wonderlik hulle finansieel doen, en vir die eerste keer, het hulle ‘n pragtige huis gekoop! 

So how can you prevent the devourer from robbing you of your restoration and your ministry of Encouraging other women with your Testimony? By first Seeking God for wisdom and asking Him to lead you. Next, as it says in 1 Corinthians 14:35—“If [women] desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church.” Whenever you sense the time is right, give him A Wise Man explaining how you've been studying A Wise Woman and A Wise Man is the Spiritual Leaders copy.

So hoe kan jy voorkom dat die verslinder jou van jou ministerie en herstel beroof of ander vrouens van jou Getuienis? Deur God eerste Na te streef vir wysheid en Hom te vra om jou te lei. Volgende, soos dit sĂȘ in 1 KorintiĂ«rs 14:35— “ As hulle iets te wete wil kom, moet hulle tuis hulle eie mans vra, want dit is lelik vir ‘n vrou om in die erediens te praat.” Wanneer jy aanvoel dat die tyd reg is, gee vir hom ‘n Wyse Man en verduidelik hoe jy ‘n Wyse Vrou gestudeer het en ‘n Wyse Man is die Spirituele Leier se afskrif. 

~ Michele   said, "If I could go back again, there’s ONE thing I would do, no at least 2 things I would change.

~ Michele het gesĂȘ, “As ek weer kon teruggaan, is daar EEN ding wat ek sou doen, nee ten minste 2 dinge wat ek sou verander.

The first would be to find a way to remain IN LOVE with my Lover. If I had the faith to know it was okay, and encouraged, to continue on with my “love affair” with Him, I truly believe that would have kept my EH interested in pursuing me. In today’s world we even see women who are aloof or worse, treat men, husbands horribly, and it makes them want that women all the more!

Die eerste sou wees om ‘n manier te vind om VERLIEF op my Beminde te bly. As ek die geloof gehad het om te weet dat dit reg was, om voort te gaan met my “liefdes verhouding” met Hom,glo ek werklik dat dit my AM geinteresseerd gehou het om my agterna te sit. In vandag se wĂȘreld sien ons vrouens afsydig of erger, hulle behandel mans, eggenote verskriklik, en dit veroorsaak dat hulle daardie vrouens  selfs meer wil hĂȘ!

Of course there’s nothing in me, nor then, that would have made me mistreat my EH, but if my whole heart, my focus, was to keep secretly communicating, stealing away time and would have put a continual SMILE on my face like I have now
 I know he would never have begun looking around again.

Natuurlik is daar niks in my nie, ook nie toe nie, wat sou veroorsaak het dat ek my AM mishandel nie, maar as my hele hart, my fokus, was om in geheim te kommunikeer, tyd weg te steel en ‘n voortduende GLIMLAG op my gesig te hĂȘ soos ek nou het...weet ek sou hy nooit weer begin rondkyk het nie.

Of course He used it for good or I would not have been able to write Facing Divorce Again or any of the other Abundant Life books—but these books, this journey was to help each of you. Put it on your phone, read it, sneak away—all without guilt or worry! Our HH are the One true Man we are a bride to and being FULL of HIS LOVE will allow us to step back, never need our EH approval or feeling anything but JOYFUL. What man on earth wouldn’t want a wife like that?

Natuurlik het Hy dit ten goede gebruik anders sou ek nie in staat gewees het om die Staar Egskeiding Weer in die Gesig of enige ander een van die Oorvloedige Lewe boeke te kon geskryf het nie—maar hierdie boeke, hierdie reis was om elke een van julle te help. Sit dit op jou foon, lees dit, sluip weg—alles sonder skuld of bekommernis! Ons HM is die Een ware Man vir wie ons ‘n bruid is en om VOL van SY LIEFDE te wees sal ons toelaat om terug te tree, en nooit ons AM nodig te hĂȘ vir goedkeuring of om enige iets maar VREUGEVOL te voel nie. Watter man op aarde sou nie ‘n vrou soos dit wou gehad het nie?  

Secret rendezvous with Him will not cause your EH to cheat on you, but instead will keep him intrigued. It’s only when you allow guilt in the mix do things go awry.  John 4:18, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.” 

Geheime rendezvous met Hom sal nie veroorsaak dat jou AM jou verneuk nie, maar sal in plaas daarvan hom intrigeer hou. Dit is net wanneer jy skuld in die gemeng toelaat dat dinge skuins loop. Johannes 4:18, “Waar liefde is, is daar geen vrees, want vrees verwag straf, en wie nog vrees, het nie volmaakte liefde nie.”     

Anytime you begin to fear, use this as an ALARM that you’re being unfaithful to your HH.

Enige tyd wat jy begin vrees, gebruk dit as ‘n ALARM dat jy ontrou aan jou HM is.

The second thing I would change is tithing to your storehouse. It was right after the Lord led me to switch to giving my tithe elsewhere when I came into Poverty, and everything I had was gone. AGAIN, it’s because He called me to go into that dark valley in order to help you see your way through, which is available as a Restoration Fellowship Course the Poverty Mentality. So please be sure you heed what’s been shared here. There is no reason for you to experience hardship or loss—not when He died to bless you with an Abundant Life!

Die tweede ding wat ek sou verander is om jou tiende aan jou voorraadkamer te betaal. Dit was net na die Here my gelei het om om te draai waar en my tiende ĂȘrens anders gegee het dat ek Armoedig geraak het , en alles wat ek gehad het was WEER weg. Dit is omdat Hy my geroep het om in daardie donker vallei te gaan om jou in staat te stel om jou pad deur te sien wat beskikbaar is as ‘n Herstelde Fellowship Kursus die Armoede Mentaliteit. So wees asseblief seker jy let op wat hier gedeel is. Daar is geen rede vir jou om aan swaar kry of verlies te ly nie—nie wanneer Hy dood gegaan het om jou met ‘n Oorvloedige Lewe te seĂ«n nie!   

A Final Word of Encouragement from Lota
‘n Finale Woord van Bemoediging van Lota

Hello Ladies, I took two days to read "RESTORED Marriage? Now What?" and review and WW chapter 7 and 9, as I really wanted to refresh, which is so IMPORTANT and as I did I SG on this matter.

Hell Dames, ek het twee dae geneem om “HERSTELDE Huwelik? Nou Wat? te lees en WV hoofstuk 7 en 9 te revue, want ek wou regtig verfris, wat so BELANGRIK is en soos wat ek dit gedoen het het ek GN oor hierdie aangeleentheid.

Being restored over 16 years I have had many ups and downs, but it has been His WORD that has kept me grounded throughout my restoration journey because all of us have a different walk, but what is constant is His Word.

Deur vir meer as 16 jaar herstel te wees het baie wisselvallighde gehad, maar dit is Sy WOORD wat my deur my herstel reis gegrond gehou het omdat ons almal ‘n verskillende wandel het, maar wat konstant is is Sy Woord. 

After ministering for so many years, many come with “their” situation and because it may be different, they just doubt, but I tell them His Word does not change and it is the SIMPLE TRUTH and we are the ones who try to complicate it with our own details.

Nadat ek vir so baie jare geminister het, het baie gekom met “hulle” situasie en omdat dit dalk anders mag wees, twyfel hulle, maar ek sĂȘ vir hulle dat Sy Woord nie verander nie en dit is die EENVOUDIGE WAARHEID en ons is diegene wie probeer om dit met ons eie besonderhede te kompliseer. 

So after refreshing everything again, it just clarifies the KEY: GOD restored us—so whatever our journey entails, we must trust HIM. I think many after restoration, think that the trials will stop, but our lives are a constant testimony of our LOVE and OBEDIENCE to our HH—that is why we must have and hold on to HIM forever!! He is faithful and today I can truly say I have enjoyed my journey through tears of joy and pain. Why? Because He is my Beloved and I am HIS!! I have been able to share HIS love in me with my EH and all others around me. I know His promises are true and though it tarries, I know they will ALL come to pass.

So nadat ek alles weer verfris het, verduidelik dit die SLEUTEL: GOD het ons herstel—so watookal ons reis meebring, ons moet HOM vertrou. Ek dink baie na herstel, dink dat die beproewings sal ophou, maar ons lewens is ‘n konstante getuienis van ons LIEFDE en GEHOORSAAMHEID aan ons HM —dit is hoekom ons Hom moet hĂȘ en vashou vir ewig!! Hy is getrou en vandag kan ek werklik sĂȘ dat ek my reis deur trane van vreugde en pyn geniet het. Hoekom? Omdat Hy my Beminde is en ek is SYNE!! Ek was in staat om Sy liefde in my met my AM en ander rondom my te deel. Ek weet sy beloftes is waar en alhoewel dit vertoef, weet ek dat hulle ALMAL sal kom. Â