If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.

—John 14:15

As julle My liefhet, sal julle my opdragte uitvoer.

—Johannes 14:15 

Thinking that this would be the final chapter of this book, I sought the Lord for the most important principle on which to conclude with: a principle that has changed my life, and that hopefully, will change your life as well.

Ek het gedink dat hierdie die finale hoofstuk van hierdie boek sou wees, ek het die Here gesog vir die mees belangrikste beginsel om mee te eindig: ‘n beginsel wat my lewe verander het en hopelik, jou lewe ook sal verander.

What the Lord told me was a complete surprise. In the days since He first told me that this chapter needed to be about the blessings of obedience (submission and the like), He has revealed to me so much more that I hope to be able to fully share with you in this chapter. Revelation that I believe could literally change the course of your life, if that is, you take it to heart and seek to obey, no matter the cost.

Wat die Here my vertel het was heeltemal ‘n verrassing. In die dae vandat Hy my eers vertel het dat hierdie hoofstuk moet gaan oor die seëninge van gehoorsaamheid (onderdanigheid en iets sortgelyks), het Hy  soveel meer aan my onthul wat ek hoop ek in staat sal wees om heeltemal met julle in hierdie hoofstuk te deel, dit is, dat jy dit ter harte sal neem en sog om te gehoorsaam, maak nie saak wat die koste is nie.    

The opening verse needs to be read again: “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments” (John 14:15).

Die openings vers moet weer gelees word: As julle My liefhet, sal julle my opdragte uitvoer” (Johannes 14:15).

To me, love is the key. If we love the Lord, it will show Him (and others who are watching), by how determined we are to obey Him. Now stop and think on that thought for a while. 

Vir my, is liefde die sleutel. As ons lief is vir die Here, sal dit Hom (en ander wat toekyk) wys, deur hoe vasberade ons is om Hom te gehoorsaam. Nou stop en dink daaroor vir ‘n rukkie.

Now, if our obedience shows our love for Him, our lack of obedience, or disobedience, shows Him (and others) the contrary. This means that disobedience says we do NOT love the Lord. Are you getting it?

Nou, as ons gehoorsaamheid ons liefde vir Hom wys, ons tekort aan gehoorsaamheid, of ongehooorsaamheid, sal Hom (en ander) die teenoorgestelde wys. Dit beteken dat ongehoorsaamheid beteken dat ons NIE lief is vir die Here nie. Verstaan jy dit?

With this principle well established for us to build upon, the Bible tells us clearly that we are each to submit to the authorities over us. If we are married, we are to submit to our husbands. If we are not married (and live at home), we are to submit to our parents. If we have parents who are still alive, we are to honor them. If we have a boss, we are to submit and be obedient to them. If we are in school, our obedience is to our teachers, our principal, etc. All of us live in a country where there are laws: traffic, public, state, local; the list of those in authority over us is endless.

Met hierdie beginsel wel gevestig vir ons om op te bou, sê die Bybel vir ons duidelik dat ons moet onderwerp aan die gesag wat oor ons geplaas is. As ons getroud is moet ons ons aan ons mans onderwerp. As ons nie getroud is nie (en by die huis bly), moet ons ons aan ons ouers onderwerp. As ons ouers het wie nog steeds lewe, moet ons hulle eer. As ons ‘n baas het, moet ons ons aan hulle onderwerp en gehoorsaam wees aan hulle. As ons in die skool is, moet ons gehoorsaam aan ons onderwysers, ons prinsipaal, ens. Almal van ons bly in ‘n land waar daar wette is: verkeers, publieke, staat, plaaslike; die lys van die wat in gesag oor ons is is eindeloos. 

The Lord tells us that for us to be blessed we MUST be obedient to each and every one of these authorities, whether or not we agree and whether or not these authorities are good and kind or even cruel. If you are still not convinced, read these two verses carefully:

Die Here sê vir ons dat vir ons om geseën te word MOET ons gehoorsaam wees aan ieder en elke een van hierdie wat in gesag is, hetsy ons saamstem of nie of hierdie gesag goed en vriendelik is of selfs wreed. As jy nog steeds nie oortuig is nie, lees hierdie twee verse versigtig: 

“Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities for there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.

“Elke mens moet hom onderwerp aan die owerhede wat oor hom gestel is. Daar is immers geen gesag wat nie van God kom nie.

Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.

Wie hom teen gesag verset, kom dus in opstand teen die ordening van God; en wie in opstand kom, sal sy verdiende straf kry..

For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same . . .” (Romans 13:1–3).

‘n Mens hoef nie vir die owerhede bang te wees as jy goed doen nie, maar wel as jy kwaad doen. Wil jy sonder vrees vir die owerheid lewe? Doen dan wat goed is, en die owerheid sal jou prys…” (Romeine 13:1-3).

“Servants, be submissive to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are unreasonable. For this finds favor, if for the sake of conscience toward God a person bears up under sorrows when suffering unjustly. For what credit is there if, when you sin and are harshly treated, you endure it with patience? But if when you do what is right and suffer for it you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God” (1 Peter 2:18–20).

“Bediendes, onderwerp julle met die nodige ontsag aan julle werkgewers, of hulle nou goedhartig en vriendelik is, of onredelik. Dit is genade as iemand die pyn van onverdiende lyding verduur omdat hy aan God getrou wil wees. As julle gestraf word wanneer julle oortree het, watter verdienste is daarin as julle dit verdra? Maar om lyding te verdra wanneer julle goed doen, dit is genade van God” (1 Petrus 2:18-20). 

You know, when I read that last verse I understood just WHY I have been so adamant and so careful to be obedient every moment of my life. Favor. Submission finds favor with God. I do not know about you, but what I want in my life is to be surrounded by God’s favor. This is how we live the abundant life—heaven on earth.

Jy weet, wanneer ek die laaste vers lees het ek verstaan HOEKOM ek so vasberade en so versigtig is om elke oomblik van my lewe gehoorsaam te wees. Guns. Onderdanigheid vind guns by God. Ek weet nie van jou nie, maar wat ek in my lewe wil hê is om omsingel te wees met God se guns. Dit is hoe ons die oorvloedige lewe leef—hemel op aarde.

As I mentioned in the last paragraph, there is something that I really want to expound upon in this chapter and this is the reason why I said that I am “careful” to be obedient every moment of my life. Right now, I am flying home, my 17th flight (one more to go) after touring Asia, the Far East, or the Orient, as many call it. Because I have been flying extensively, I have heard and seen the safety instructions until I think that I can give the demonstration myself! However, I still pay attention and listen since I want to be in obedience to the authority of the airline, the captain, and the flight attendant. You may think this is idiotic and takes this principle of obedience too far. But if I choose to ignore this level of authority, how far will I take it—to ignore it until I walk right out of the boundary of God’s favor? I am not sure how wide the boundaries of His favor are; therefore, I am very careful on every level since I don’t want to risk stepping out of it.

Soos ek in die laaste paragraaf genoem het, daar is iets wat ek regtig oor wil uitbrei oor hierdie hoofstuk en dit is die rede hoekom ek gesê het dat ek “versigtig” gaan wees om gehoorsaam te wees elke oomblik van my lewe. Op hierdie oomblik is ek per vlug op pad huis toe, my 17de vlug, (nog een om te gaan) na ek Asia getoer het, die Verre Ooste, of die Ooste, soos wat baie dit noem. Omdat ek ekstensief gevlieg het het ek die veiligheids instruksies gesien en gehoor totdat ek dink ek kan die demonstrasie myself gee! Nietemin, skenk ek nog steeds aandag en luister aangesien ek gehoorsaam wil wees aan die gesag van die lug redery, die kaptein, en die vliegpersoneel. Jy mag dink dit is idioties en neem die beginsel van gehoorsaamheid te ver. Maar as ek verkies om hierdie vlak van gesag te ignoreer, hoe ver sal ek dit voer—om te ignoreer  totdat ek uit die grenslyn van God se guns loop? Ek is nie seker hoe wyd die grenslyn van Sy guns is nie; daarom, is ek baie versigtig op elke vlak aangesien ek nie die risiko wil neem om daaruit te tree nie. 

In all the chapters I have written in this book (and the other book I have had the pleasure of writing and living through), the Lord has brought situations into my life as examples of the principles He teaches me, in order that I will share and teach them to you. Though we have really powerful women in ministry and in leadership, just recently the Lord has brought to my attention the fact that so many, so many, do not walk in obedience, and it spills over into every area of their lives. The truth is, if you are under someone’s authority and you usurp that authority by doing what you want to do rather than what the person in authority asks you to do, you are in rebellion. 

I al die hoofstukke wat ek in hierdie boek geskryf het (en die ander boek wat ek die vreugde gehad het om te skryf en deur te lewe), het die Here t situasies in my lewe gebring as voorbeelde van die beginsels wat Hy my geleer het, omdat ek hulle met julle moet deel en julle daarvan moet leer. Alhoewel ons regtig pragtige vrouens in ministerie en leierskap het, net onlangs het die Here dit onder my aandag gebring dat die feit is dat so baie, so baie nie in gehoorsaamheid loop nie, en dit vloei oor in elke gebied van hulle lewens. Die waarheid is, as jy onder iemand anders se gesag staan en jy usurpeer daardie gesag deur te doen wat jy wil eerder as wat die persoon in gesag jou vra om te doen, is jy weerspannig.  

“For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and insubordination is as iniquity and idolatry because you have rejected the word of the LORD, He has also rejected you from being king” (1 Samuel 15:23).

“Weerspannigheid is net so erg as die sonde van waarsêery; eiesinnigheid net so erg as die bedrog van afgodery. Omdat jy die woprd van die HERE verwerp het, het Hy jou as koning verwerp” (1 Sameul 15:23).

Rebellion is living dangerously, and I want no part of it. As a matter of fact, I don’t even want to associate with it. On this very lengthy trip, I ended up actually parting ways with a member of my women’s ministry who started out traveling with me, because she was continually insubordinate. Insubordination is not the same as rebellion, although I had thought for years that it was. 

Weeerspannig is om gevaarlik te lewe, en ek wil geen deel daaraan hê nie. Om die waarheid te sê, ek wil nie eens daarmee assosieer nie. Op hierdie lang reis, het ek eintlik opgeeindig om skeiding te neem van ‘n lidmaat van my vroue ministerie wat my op my reis vergesel het, omdat sy aanhoudend weerspannig was. Weerspannigheid is nie dieselfde as rebellie nie, alhoewel ek vir jare gedink het dit is.

Insubordination is when we take the authority that belongs to someone over us. It could be, and many times is in marriage— when a woman takes charge in their marriage and rules over her husband. In homes today, children are insubordinate almost from infancy. Children are who are really in charge while the mother and/or father submits to their whims and demands. What a tragedy!

Weerspannigheid is wanneer ons die gesag neem wat aan iemand anders oor ons behoort. Dit mag wees, en baie keer is dit in huwelike—wanneer ‘n vrou beheer neem in die huwelik en oor haar man regeer. In huise vandag, is kinders weerspannig amper al van kleintyd af. Kinders is wie regtig in beheer is terwyl die moeder en/of vader aan hulle aan hulle streke en vereistes onderwerp. Wat ‘n tragedie! 

“O My people! Their oppressors are children, and women rule over them. O My people!” (Isaiah 3:12). 

“My volk het kinders as regeerders, vrouens as heersers. My volk, jou leiers verlei jou en bring jou van koers af” (Jesaja 3:12).

“The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother” (Proverbs 29:15). 

"n Pak slae en ‘n teregwysing bring wysheid; ‘n kind wat sonder dissipline grootword, steek sy moeder in die skande” (Spreuke 29:15).

By taking authority over the one who really should be in authority over us (remember that all authority is established by God?), then we are in idolatry. Who is our idol? Ourselves. We put ourselves forth as the one to worship. Let’s not forget that this is the first sin, the sin that created the demonic world that battles against us every day. Lucifer wanted to be equal or above God, and thus, sin was established. Things have never been the same since that time. Insubordination, which is idolatry, is something we must run from and avoid at all costs.

Deur gesag te neem oor die een wat regtig in gesag behoort te wees oor ons (onthou dat alle gesag deur God vasgestel is?), dan is ons in idolatrie. Wie is ons afgod” Onsself. Ons plaas ons self voor as die een om te loof. Laat ons nie vergeet dat dit die eerste sonde was nie, die sonde wat die demoniese wêreld geskep het wat elke dag teen ons baklei. Lucifer wou gelyke of bo God wees, en dus, was sonde gevestig. Dinge was nooit dieselfde van toe af nie. Weerspannigheid, wat idolatrie is, is iets waarvan ons moet weg hardloop en ten alle koste vermy.

Though I would really need an entire chapter, and probably a book, to really deal with the principle of insubordination and the counterpart of honoring parents, let me just say that in the United States, we are so far off when dealing with elderly parents. Grown children today treat their parents with such little honor and respect it really makes me grieve and literally makes me sick. I will tell you that I paid a very high price to continue to honor my parents before they died: a high price. (But that needs to be another book and I am not yet ready to touch on that pain.) But I would do it again in a heartbeat if I had to go through it again. If you have grown parents, I warn you to be very careful how you speak to them, speak about them, and how you treat them.

Alhoewel ek regtig ‘n hele hoofstuk nodig moet hê, en moontlik ‘n boek, om regtig af te handel met die beginsel van weerspannigheid en die teenbeeld om jou ouers te eer, laat ek net sê in die V.S.A, is ons so ver af wanneer ons bejaarde ouers behandel. Volwasse kinders van vandag behandel hulle ouers met so bietjie eer en respek dit grief my en maak my letterlik siek. Ek sal jou sê dat ek ‘n baie duur prys betaal het om voort te gaan om my ouers te eer voordat hulle dood is: ‘n baie hoë rys. (Maar dit moet nog ‘n boek wees en ek is nie gereed om daardie pyn aan te raak nie.) Maar ek sal dit weer in ‘n hartklop doen as ek weer daardeur moet gaan. As jy volwasse ouers het, waarsku ek jou om baie versigtig te wees oor hoe jy met hulle praat, oor hulle praat, en hoe jy hulle behandel.    

“Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the LORD your God gives you” (Deuteronomy 5:16).

“Eer jou vader en jou moeder, soos die Here jou God jou beveel het, dan sal jy ‘n lang lewe hê en sal dit goed gaan met jou in die land wat die Here GOD vir jou gee” (Deuteronomium 5:16).

“For God said, ‘HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER,’ and, ‘HE WHO SPEAKS EVIL OF FATHER OR MOTHER IS TO BE PUT TO DEATH’” (Matthew 15:4).

“God het tog gesê: ‘EER JOU VADER EN JOU MOEDER’ en: ‘WIE SY VADER OF SY MOEDER VLOEK, MOET SEKERLIK DOODGEMAAK WORD’” (Matteus 15:4). 

And let me say that there is no excuse for treating your parents as if they were your child; not even when they are plagued with dementia (such as Alzheimer’s). You can still honor what you know they would want, just like women who begin to submit to their husbands who are gone. Honor them by making decisions for them since you know what they would want if they could express it to you. And don’t make the excuse that your decision is for their good when that’s just an excuse to hide behind, because God sees your heart.

En laat ek net sê daar is geen verskoning om jou ouers te behandel asof hulle jou kind is nie, nie eens wanneer hulle aan dementia ly nie (soos Alzheimers). Jy kan nog steeds eer wat jy weet hulle sou wou hê, net soos vrouens wat aan hulle mans onderdanig is wanneer hulle weg is. Eer hulle deur besluite te maak vir hulle aangesien jy weet wat hulle sou wou hê as hulle dit vir jou kan noem. En moet nie die verskoning maak dat jou besluit is hulle ten goede wanneer dit net ‘n verskoning is om agter dit te skuil nie omdat God jou hart kan sien.

The wisdom and understanding I’m sharing with you came by going through it when I did it all wrong, and then finding the path to righteousness as I sought the Lord. When my father was hospitalized, he was told that he needed a pacemaker. He very kindly told the doctors (and his family) that he had lived a long life and that that he didn’t want one. Unfortunately, I had his “power of attorney,” and with that power, I was a target for my siblings (I am one of eleven children) to push me to make the decision against my father’s wishes “since he obviously couldn’t choose for himself” they all agreed, but this was well before dementia ever hit him. I regrettably signed the papers for him to get the pacemaker.

Die wysheid en verstandhouding wat ek met jou deel het gekom deur ek dit alles verkeerd gedoen het, en dan die pad na regverdigheid gevind het soos ek die Here gesog het. Toe my vader gehospitaliseer is, het hulle vir hom gesê hy het ‘n  pasaangeër nodig. Hy het vriendelik vir die dokters (en familie) vertel dat hy ‘n lang lewe gelei het en dat hy nie een wou gehad het nie. Ongelukkig, het ek “volmag” gehad en met daardie mag, was ek ‘n teiken vir my broers en susters (ek is een van elf kinders) om my te druk om die besluit teen my vader se wense te maak “aangesien hy oënskynlik nie vir homself kon kies nie’ hulle het almal ingestem, maar dit was ver voor dementia hom ooit getref het. Ek het met spyt die papiere geteken vir hom om ‘n pasaangeër te kry.  

For the next few years, I watched my father die a slow death to the point that he spent the last nine months of his life bedridden. My siblings didn’t witness his suffering since they lived states away and some in other countries. So due to what I’d done, I watched my hero (who was once a famous and talented artist) not be able to sign his name or feed himself. To date it had been the biggest mistake of my life when I signed the papers for that pacemaker and dishonored my father. I paid a high price for my insubordination.

Vir die volgende paar jare, het ek toegekyk hoe my vader ‘n stadige dood sterf tot op die punt dat hy die laaste paar maande van sy lewe bedlêend was. My broers en susters het nie hierdie lyding attesteer nie omdat hulle state weg gebly het en sommige in ander lande. So as gevolg van wat ek gedoen het, het ek toegekyk hoe my held (wat eens op ‘n tyd ‘n bekende en talentvolle kunstenaar was) nie in staat was om sy naam te teken of homself te voer nie. Tot op datum was dit die grootste fout van my lewe toe ek die papiere geteken het vir daardie pasaangeër en my vader onteer het. Ek ht ‘n hoë prys betaal vir my weerspannigheid. 

Yet as we all know, God is a God of second chances. Within five years, I had my chance to redeem myself and to learn a very hard lesson about honoring a parent, no matter the cost. First, I had to repent to my mother regarding dishonoring my father. She, too, had to suffer and care for him and to watch him die slowly, painfully and with horrible humiliation. Though God did use that time for good (Romans 8:28) because my mother helped as one of the editors of A Wise Woman book, working with me when Erin revised it. And although she said that the principles were for other women, not for her, God changed her. Then He gave her another chance to be the wife that I know she had probably always wanted to be for my father. She was able to redeem what the locusts had eaten. God is awesome. Thank you Erin.

Tog soos wat ons almal weet, God is ‘n God van tweede kanse. Binne vyf jaar, het ek my tweede kans gekry om myself goed te maak en om ‘n baie moeilike les te leer oor hoe om ‘n ouer te eer, maak nie saak wat die koste is nie. Eerstens, ek moes by my ma berou hê omdat ek my vader oneer het. Sy, moes ook ly en agter hom kyk en toekyk hoe hy ‘n stadige dood sterf, pynlik en met aaklige vernedering. Alhoewel God die tyd ten goede gebruik het (Romeine 8:28) omdat my moeder gehelp het as een van die redakteurs van ‘n Wyse Vrou boek, en met my gewerk het terwyl Erin dit hersien het. En alhoewel sy gesê het dat die beginsel vir ouer vrouens was, nie vir haar nie, het God haar verander. Toe gee hy haar nog ‘n kans  om die vrou te wees wat ek weet sy moontlik altyd wou wees vir my vader. Sy was in staat om goed te maak wat die springkane geeet het. God is wonderlik. Dankie Erin.  

Let me now continue to share about my second chance. It came in the year 2000, five years after my dad died. My mom became weak and sickly but she did not want to go to the doctor. She had always been like that. As a matter of fact, after my father died, while I was taking care of all the insurance paperwork, the insurance company asked when my mother had died. I told the lady that she didn’t; she was still living. The reason she believed she’d died was that her insurance records showed that the last time she had seen a doctor was in 1959, which was the day my youngest sister was born—a full thirty-nine years without seeing a doctor.

Laat my nou voort gaan om te deel oor my tweede kans. Dit het gekom in die jaar 2000, vyf jaar na my vader dood is. My moeder het wakker geword en sieklik maar sy wou nie dokter toe gaan nie. Sy was nog altyd so. Om die waarheid te sê, nadat my vader dood is, terwyl ek besig was om al die assuransie papier werk af te handel, het die assuransie my gevra wanneer my moeder dood is. Ek het vir die dame gesê dat my moeder nie dood is nie; sy lewe nog. Die rede waarom sy geglo het dat sy dood was was omdat haar rekords gewys het dat die laaste keer wat sy laas by die dokter was was in 1959, wat die dag was wat my jongste suster gebore is—’n volle 39 jaar gelede sonder om ‘n dokter te sien.

So as my mother became more ill, just as before, I began to receive a lot of pressure from my siblings, insisting that I had to get my mother to a doctor—I refused. Within weeks, my mother began to speak to me about “when I die . . .” She told me honestly and very calmly that either Jesus would heal her or she would go to heaven. No doctor. 

So soos wat my moeder sieker geword het, net soos vantevore, het ek begin om baie druk van my broers en susters te kry, wat daarop aandring dat ek my moeder by ‘n dokter moes kry, ek het geweier. Binne weke, het my ma met my begin praat oor “wanneer ek doodgaan. . .” Sy het vir my eerlik en baie kalm gesê dat of Jesus moet haar genees of sy sou hemel toe gaan. Geen dokter,  

No matter what it cost me, I was determined to honor my mother and to obey. Just a few short weeks later, while I was cleaning her room, my mother died in her own bed, no doctor. I stood there listening, but she didn’t take another breath. Calmly, I called the funeral home. (My mother and I had made prior arrangements together when we had gone there for my father’s arrangements.) They told me that since she died at home, I needed to call paramedics to confirm her death. When they arrived, the police came as well, and within a few minutes, I had five different officers asking me questions. It was the last plainclothes policeman who asked me, “Do you have any idea what is happening?” When I said “no,” he told me very kindly that I was being charged with the death of my mother. Since I had not sought medical help, and as I was with her during her death and did not call 911 when I knew she was dying, I was being charged with taking her life.

Maak nie saak wat dit my kos nie, ek was vasbeslote om my ma te eer en te gehoorsaam. net ‘n paar kort weke later, terwyl ek besig was om haar kamer skoon te maak, het my ma in haar eie bed gesterf, geen dokter. Ek het daar gestaan en luister, maar sy het nog asem gehaal nie. Kalm het ek die begrafnis ondernemer geskakel. (My moeder en ek het vooraf saam reëlings getref toe ons soontoe gegaan het vir my vader se reëlings.) Hulle het vir my gesê dat aangesien sy by die huis dood is, ek die paramedici moet skakel om haar dood te bevestig. Toe hulle arriveer, het die polisie ook gekom, en binne ‘n paar minute, het ek vyf verskillende offisiere gehad wat my vrae gevra het. Dit was die laaste gewone klere polisieman wat my gevra het , “Het jy enige idee wat besig is om te gebeur?” Toe ek “nee “ sê het hy my baie vriendelik vertel dat ek aangekla is op die dood van my moeder. Aangesien ek nie mediese hulp gekry het nie, ek ek by haar was gedurende haar dood en het nie 911 geskakel toe ek geweet het sy was besig om dood te gaan nie. Ek was aangekla met die neem van haar lewe.

As I said, this really needs to be another book, but as you have probably guessed, the charges were eventually dropped after many lengthy investigations. But the criminal charges were later followed by Family Services charging me with “abuse, neglect, and exploitation of an elderly person.” These charges were also dropped, many months later, and after many lengthy investigations. It also kept me from attending my mother’s memorial service and it requiring special permission from the state to be allowed to move out of state with my family.

Soos ek gesê het, dit moet regtig ‘n ander boek wees, maar soos jy moontlik geraai het, die aanklag was mettertyd terug getrek na baie langdurige ondersoeke. Maar die kriminele aanklagte was later gevolg deur die welsyn wat my aangekla het van mishandeling, nalatigheid, en uitbuiting van ‘n bejaarde persoon.” Hierdie aanklagte was ook terug getrek, baie maande later en na baie langdurige ondersoeke. Dit het my ook weerhou om my moeder se gedenks diens by te woon en vereis dat ek spesiale toestemming moes verkry om uit die staat trek met my familie. 

Needless to say, it was a nightmare that few will ever face. I had paid a high price to honor and obey my mother’s wishes, but as I have said before, if I had it to do again, I would gladly pay the price.

Nodeloos om te sê, dit was ‘n nagmerrie wat baie min ooit sal hoef te ervaar. Ek het ‘n hoë prys betaal om my moeder se wense te eer en te gehoorsaam, maar soos ek gesê het, as ek dit weer moes doen, sal ek bly wees om die prys te betaal. 

One thing that I do know for certain is that I have shown honor as a daughter to my parents. Therefore, I am assured that my children will honor me and I am seeing it already. Throughout my married life, I witnessed first-hand my former husband dishonoring his parents. Without really understanding the grave consequences, he and his older brother are notorious for trying to tell, especially their mother, what to do and not do. There were many loud, public disputes and disagreements, very often about how she spent her time and money. I was never really in the position to be able to talk to my former husband about it when we were married (since this would be the same insubordination as I am sharing about here). After we were divorced, however, I was able to talk to him briefly about my concern. 

Een ding wat ek wel verseker weet is dat ek eer as ‘n dogter vir my ouers gewys het. Daarom is ek verseker dat my kinders my sal eer en ek sien dit alreeds. Gedurende my getroude lewe, het ek eerste-hands getuig hoe my vorige man sy ouers oneer. Sonder om regtig die ernstige nagevolge te verstaan,is hy en sy ouer broer welbekend om vernaamlik hulle moeder, te vertel wat om te doen of nie te doen nie. Daar was baie luid, publieke argumentasies, baie dikwels oor hoe sy haar tyd en geld spandeer. Ek was nooit regtig in die posisie om in staat te wees om met my vorige man te praat toe ons getroud was nie (aangesien dit dieselfde weerspannigheid sou wees as waarvan ek hier deel). Nadat ons geskei was, nietemin, was ek in staat om kortliks met hom te praat oor my bekommernis.    

Currently, my former husband is living with his mother. Though we don’t really talk now (since he is presently engaged; we are friendly but no longer friends like we were), he told me how horrible it was to have her treat him as a kid. How she got on him about everything, especially his drinking. I thought to myself that maybe God was giving him a second chance to get things right with his mother. I am not sure if he knows it, nor if he will take the opportunity to honor his mother, but the consequences may be more than he bargained for. Though my children are very, very respectful of all authority, I was in utter shock and surprise that my children have never encouraged me to seek restoration with their father. As a matter of fact, they’re against it. When he moved states away, and later planned to move back to the area where we live “if he had the money,” it was my children who did not want me to give him the money. Insubordination is sin and the Bible is clear, what we sow, we will indeed reap.

Huidiglik, bly my vorige man saam sy moeder. Alhoewel ons nie regtig nou praat nie (aangesien hy huidig verloof is; ons is vriendelik maar nie meer vriende soos ons eens op ‘n tyd was nie), hy het vir my gesê hoe aaklig dit vir hom was toe sy hom soos ‘n kind behandel het. Hoe sy oral oor hom was oor alles, vernaam sy gedrinkery. Ek het gedink dat miskien gee die Here hom ‘n tweede kans om dinge reg te stel met sy moeder. Ek is nie seker of hy dit weet nie, nog minder of hy die geleentheid sal vat om sy moeder te eer, maar die nagevolge mag meer wees as wat hy op reken. Alhoewel my kinders baie, baie respekvol van alle gesag was was ek uiters geskok en verras dat my kinders my  nooit aangemoedig om herstel te soek met hulle vader nie. Om die waarheid te sê hulle was daarteen. Toe hy state weg getrek het, en later beplan het om terug te trek na die gebied waar ons bly “as hy die geld gehad het,” was dit my kinders wat hom nie die geld wou gee nie. Weerspannigheid is ‘n sonde en die Bybel is duidelik, wat ons saai, sal ons inderdaad oes. 

As I said, this is not the way my children usually are. They have never been disrespectful to him, spoken against him, or refused to see or speak to him. All I can say is that this verse is also true:

Soos ek gesê het, dit is nie hoe my kinders gewoonlik is nie. Hulle was nog nooit disrespekvol teenoor hom nie, teen hom gepraat nie, of geweier om hom te sien of met hom te praat nie. Al wat ek kan sê is dat die vers ook waar is:

“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap” (Galatians 6:7).

“Moenie julleself mislei nie: God laat nie met Hom spot nie. Wat ‘n mens saai, dit sal hy ook oes” (Galasiërs 6:7).

Now that we’ve covered insubordination, what exactly then does it mean to be obedient? Sometimes, we need to see what not being obedient is to fully understand what obedience is. Here is an example of disobedience from one of our television members that I observed just last night. I was invited to stay overnight with this member (when she heard I was traveling to this area), who interestingly was separated from her husband. But then, at the last minute, this woman’s husband told her that he was not comfortable with me staying in their home. However, it was going to create a big expense for me with last-minute arrangements, so she told me that I could still stay at her home since her husband had left early in the morning and he wouldn’t know. I was more than shocked, but I realized she honestly had no idea that what she did was disobedience or rebellion. This woman loves the Lord but she had no idea that she was doing anything wrong.

Nou dat ons weerspannigheid gedek het, wat presies beteken dit dan om gehoorsaam te wees? Somtyds, moet ons sien wat om nie gehoorsaam te wees is om ten volle te verstaan wat gehoorsaamheid is. Hier is ‘n voorbeeld van ongehoorsaamheid van, een van ons televisie lidmate wat ek net gisteraand waargeneem het. Ek was genooi om by hierdie lidmaat te oornag (toe sy gehoor het dat ek na hierdie gebied toe reis), wie interessant uitmekaar was van haar man. Maar toe, op die laaste minuut, het hierdie vrou se man vir haar gesê dat hy nie gemaklik was met my wat in hulle huis bly nie. Alhoewel dit groot uitgawes vir my sou beteken met laaste-minuut reëlings, so toe sê sy vir my dat ek nog steeds by haar huis kon bly omdat haar man vroeg weg die oggend weg is en hy sou nie weet nie. Ek was meer as geskok, maar ek het besef dat sy eerlik geen idee het dat wat sy doen was weerspannigheid of rebellie nie. Hierdie vrou het die Here lief maar sy het geen idee gehad dat sy iets verkeerd doen nie. 

 During this same week, one of the ladies who works for RMI as a volunteer had one incident after another of disobedience, coupled with insubordination when she made decisions without checking with Erin (since Erin had given her instructions, but she chose to do something else). When I saw what had happened, I spent a lot of time and tried my best to explain how to obey, what constituted disobedience, and how insubordination played into the scheme of things that would go very wrong. In one email, this woman stated that she did not “try to be rebellious,” to which the Lord told me “you don’t have to try to be rebellious, it comes naturally; you have to try to be obedient.” Wow.

Gedurende dieselfde week, het een van die dames wat vir HMI werk as ‘n vrywilliger die een insident na die ander van ongehoorsamheid gehad, gepaard met weerspannigheid toe sy besluite gemaak het sonder om dit met Erin na te sien nie (aangesien Erin haar instruksies gegee het, maar sy het verkies om iets anders te doen). Toe ek gesien het wat gebeur het, het ek baie tyd spandeer en my beste probeer om te verduidelik hoe om te gehoorsaam, wat weerspannigheid konstitueer, en hoe weerspannigheid gespeel het in die skema van dinge wat baie verkeerd kon gaan. In een, epos, het die vrou verklaar dat sy nie “probeer het om rebels te wees nie,” wat die Here toe vir my gesê het was  “jy hoef nie probeer om rebels te wees nie, dit kom natuurlik; jy moet probeer om gehoorsaam te wees.” Wow 

I believe that the root of rebellion, disobedience, and even insubordination, goes all the way back to our relationship with the Lord. How many times have we known what we should do but we have chosen to do something else? How many times have we excused, ignored, or reasoned why we did something that someone in authority told us not to do or what we were to do but we chose not to do it?

Ek glo dat die wortel van rebellie, ongehoorsaamheid is, en selfs weerspannigheid, en dit gaan terug na ons verhouding met die Here. Hoeveel keer het ons geweet wat ons moet doen maar het verkies om iets anders te doen? Hoe veel keer het ons verskoning gemaak, ignoreer of geresoneer, hoekom ons iets gedoen het wat iemand in gesag vir ons gesê het om te doen of nie te doen nie maar ons het verkies om dit nie te doen nie?  

As I mentioned earlier, I am on my way back home after many, many, many flights. I still hate flying. I still hate being away from family. But though I hate flying (but thankfully have no fear of flying like Erin’s shared that she has), I love the Lord so much more and it shows by obeying Him. Before I even got home, my church had already booked an extensive tour to Africa and Europe that may even include time in South America. Many of you who love to travel may envy me, but those who are closest to me see clearly that I love the Lord with all my heart, because they all know that I hate to travel and I am a simple homebody. I’ve always been happiest at home and am very content to just care for my home and family. So if given a choice, I would remain home. However, I love the Lord, and it shows through my obedience to Him. 

“If you love Me . . .(John 14:15).

“As julle my liefhet . . .(Johannes 14:15).

What about you? At what level of obedience do you live? Trust me, for most of you, you have no idea that you are living in rebellion, disobedience, or insubordination. I have just witnessed this phenomenon with three of our church members whom I know love the Lord and are passionate in their desire to gain a greater intimacy with Him. But, if these sins (rebellion, disobedience, or insubordination) are active in your life, then deep intimacy with the Lord is simply impossible. This is not my opinion but God’s. And the only way that you can break this cycle, which stands in the way of true intimacy with Him, is to first admit that you are a sinner. 

Wat van jou? Op watter vlak van gehoorsaamheid lewe jy? Vertrou my, vir meeste van julle, het julle geen idee julle lewe in rebellie nie, ongehoorsaamheid, of weerspannigheid. Ek het nou net hierdie fenomeen attesteer met drie van ons kerk lede wie ek weet lief is vir die Here en is passievol in hulle begeerte om groter intimiteit met Hom te hê. Maar, as hierdie sondes (rebellie, ongehoorsaamheid, of weerspanigheid) aktief in jou lewe is, dan is diep intimiteit met die Here eenvoudig onmoontlik. Dit is nie my opinie nie maar God sin. En die enigste manier om hierdie siklus te breek, wat in die pad staan van ware intimiteit met Hom, is om eers te erken dat jy ‘n sondaar is.

“If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8).

“As ons beweer dat ons nie sonde het nie, bedrieg ons onsself en is die waarheid nie in ons nie” (1Johannes 1:8).

Secondly, ask the Lord to reveal the areas where you are living in rebellion. He will. 

Tweedens, vra die Here om gebiede te onthul waar jy in rebellie lewe. Hy sal.

Finally, begin to watch your day-to-day living habits to see ways to obey. Remember we don’t need to try to disobey, we need to try to obey. Then, once you begin this enhanced journey, you will be amazed how great it is to walk in God’s perfect will where you are always surrounded with favor and blessings. One of my greatest benefits is watching my own children who are “walking in the truth” as fruits of my obedience and now I can share John’s sentiments: “I have no greater joy than this” (3 John 1:4).

Finaal, begin om jou dag-tot-dag gewoontes dop te hou om maniere te sien om te gehoorsaam. Onthou ons hoef nie om te probeer om ongehoorsaam te wees nie, ons moet probeer om te gehoorsaam. Dan, sodra jy hierdie verhoogde reis begin, sal jy verbaas wees hoe wonderlik dit is om in God se perfekte wil te loop waar jy altyd met guns en seëninge omring is. Een van my grootste voordele is om te sien hoe my eie kinders “wat in die waarheid loop” as vrugte van my gehoorsaamheid en nou kan ek Johannes se sentiment deel: “ Niks verskaf my groter vreugde nie” (3 Johannes 1:4).